


Waiting for You

by futuristicallyspeedyparadise



Category: HIStory3 - 圈套 | HIStory3: Trapped
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-22
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:14:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23262304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/futuristicallyspeedyparadise/pseuds/futuristicallyspeedyparadise
Summary: Zhao Zi is a waiter at Trapped, one of Taiwan’s most prestigious restaurants. The head chef was recently fired and Zhao Zi can’t help but pray that the next one is a little less crazy than the last. After all, the staff could only dodge so many knives before one of them met its target.
Relationships: Jack | Fang Liang Dian & Zhao Li An | Zhao Zi, Jack | Fang Liang Dian/Zhao Li An | Zhao Zi, Meng Shao Fei/Tang Yi
Comments: 71
Kudos: 416





	1. Chapter 1

“Zhao Zi, if you stare any harder at the door, it will burst into flames.”

Zhao Zi lurched back into reality, ripping his eyes away from the kitchen door to look at Yi Qi’s brown eyes glittering in amusement. 

“Why are you so insistent on knowing the new chef? Given our experience with the last few, I would’ve thought you would want to steer clear of that kind of demented folk.”

Perhaps it had just been bad luck, but the restaurant’s endless parade of chefs had resulted in slight trepidation amongst the waitstaff about who the newcomer would be. The chef before this one had the habit of throwing literal knives when someone or something pissed him off. The one before that had emotional breakdowns every once in a while and would lock themselves up in the walk-in freezer for half an hour. And not to mention the one who used the kitchen pantry as his own personal food supply. He would “shop” for items, often the expensive stuff like truffles and Wagyu beef, and take them home to host parties; when being ousted he remained adamant that he hadn’t been stealing. 

Each of the previous chefs had cooked spectacularly, but their inability to handle the pressure--  
or their literal thievery--had made the restaurant owner Tang Yi fire them without hesitation.

Zhao Zi turned fully towards the table again and tucked into his French onion soup. The restaurant’s kitchen was massive, filled with different food stations and prep tables galore. In the corner away from the action, was an area where wait staff could grab food or take their scheduled break. One of the perks of working at the restaurant was that they would occasionally receive free meals. Zhao Zi, a self-identified foodie, could not have been any happier with that particular perk. Sometimes he was able to eat dishes that people had to pay hundreds to eat, for free. 

“I’m just curious as to who the new chef is going to be. I mean, c’mon Yi Qi. You know we’ve had quite a string of bad luck.”

“Well...you don’t have to tell me that,” Yi Qi muttered, rubbing her wrist distractedly. Her wrist had been the unfortunate receiver of the last knife that had been thrown by the previous chef. She had not been the intended target, but some things could not be forgiven. When Tang Yi, the owner, heard the news, he had dismissed the chef on the spot and assured Yi Qi that any medical expenses would be paid. Yi Qi had worn a protective band on her wrist for a month and now had a shiny scar to show for it.

“I wonder what their specialty is? I don’t know how we stay afloat. Our menu changes every time a new chef parades through this door!”

“I think that has become the novelty of it. Everytime we fire a chef and the media gets a hold of it, they start conducting polls on what our next specialty food will be.”

“I mean you can’t fault Tang Yi. Whether they are crazy or not, he does find the top people in the culinary field,” Yi Qi agreed.

Tang Yi, their boss, was a no-nonsense restaurant owner. He came out of nowhere a few years before and opened this restaurant, somehow managing to curate the top talent in the field. People wondered how a nobody could convince top chefs, sous-chefs, maître d’s and sommeliers to abandon their posts and come join his restaurant; given Tang Yi’s dubious past—it was rumored he had been affiliated with the gang activity—many figured it had been blackmail.

Despite that, or perhaps because of all the mystery, Trapped surged to the top of every national restaurant list and garnered many recognitions and awards. It’s ever changing and experimental menu, mostly due to the revolving door of chefs, kept it fresh. Though the food changed, the quality certainly did not slip. Zhao Zi had to interview extensively to be a waiter at the restaurant. It was a position that many people in the service industry, from long-time waiters to culinary students, vied for because it included great pay and benefits as well as the chance to work for the culinary greats.

Zhao Zi sighed. He loved working here at the restaurant. Despite the occasional uppity customer who felt they were too rich to have decent manners, he enjoyed the clientele and enjoyed ensuring that they had a great experience. Plus the staff at the restaurant was like family, something that was nice to have given that he had no actual family. 

He had lost his parents when he was very young and had grown up with his grandmother. His grandmother, a small but feisty woman, always made sure that he was well taken care of. She put him through school, and encouraged his love for food blogging and consumption. He missed his grandmother’s cooking the most. She made the most wonderful feasts, plates full of steaming, richly flavored food that warmed his stomach and soul. 

Stricken with a bout of pneumonia, she passed away a couple of years ago in her sleep.

The door to the kitchen creaked open, and Zhao Zi’s head whipped around to see who had come in. He groaned when he realized it was just Jun Wei, another waiter. 

The kitchen staff knew the identity of the new chef; they had had some closed-kitchen training with them to work out the new menu and how the kitchen would be run under their direction. However, it was a tradition for the kitchen staff to not reveal the identity of the new chef to the waitstaff, and legally mandatory for them not to leak information to the press. Tang Yi had made them sign non-disclosures even before the parade of chefs began. Though they had a legal obligation not to, the staff knew that helping drive the media into a speculation frenzy helped garner the restaurant free publicity and more clients which meant a prosperous business. They also just loved to take part in the fun. 

“So, sorry to disappoint,” Jun Wei said sarcastically as he made his way over to Zhao Zi and Yi Qi. The waiters at Trapped all wore black button down shirts, black slacks and a black vest. Jun Wei was tall, with an athletic build and wore his uniform well. When he drew close, he reached out to ruffle Zhao Zi’s hair. 

“Stop it!” Zhao Zi cried, fending him off. “You know the boss will kill me if he sees my hair like this,” He dropped his spoon, reaching up to pat down his hair. Jun Wei laughed and took up the seat next to Yi Qi. A line-cook came by and dropped off a bowl of soup in front of him; Jun Wei thanked them gratefully.

The cooks in the kitchen and the waitstaff had a mutual respect for each other. They understood that they needed to work cohesively in order to run the restaurant well. Their boss wouldn’t have it any other way. 

“Has the dining room been set yet or do they need help?” Zhao Zi asked Jun Wei. He finished off his soup bringing over the bowl to the sink for cleaning. 

“I think you might want to go out there and help out a bit. Hong Ye looks a bit...peeved.”

Hong Ye was the restaurant’s maître d. She was a formidable character, strong in personality and with very high standards. She was Tang Yi’s sister and together they ran the restaurant like a pair of benevolent dictators. 

Zhao Zi nodded, already heading towards the door. As he was about to push out the doors, someone pushed them in and Zhao Zi jumped back to avoid being hit. The person who walked through the door was...different. He had red wine-colored hair, a black leather jacket and boots to match. He was tall and lithe. His face was nothing short of elegant, a beautifully carved Adonis with a smirk.

“I am so sorry, sir!” he squeaked.

The man’s smirk grew wider. “No need to apologize.”

“How can I help you, sir?” Zhao Zi asked, with a slight bow. It was a habit to address all clientele as ‘sir’ and ‘madam’ or ‘miss.’ He figured that having gotten past Hong Ye, this person was surely some kind of business partner on his way to chat with Tang Yi. He wasn’t dressed like a businessman, but Tang Yi’s visitors were rarely corporate looking characters. They were often older gangster looking types, or young ones who came with their chests puffed out looking for Tang Yi and referring to him as “boss.” This one however, with his green leather jacket, simple white t-shirt and motorcycle helmet in hand was definitely one of the more interesting ones. 

“Do you call everyone, sir, or is that one particularly reserved for me, shorty?” The redhead asked, smirk still in place. 

Zhao Zi blushed. Sure he was practically a head shorter than the man who was standing unbearably close, but it hadn’t been necessary to point it out. 

“I...uh—”

“You can follow me,” came a deep voice from behind him. 

Zhao Zi turned, hearing Tang Yi’s voice. Tang Yi wore a soft gray cashmere shirt and black slacks, a rich man’s simple daytime outfit. Tang Yi turned and walked back towards his office, clearly expecting the newcomer to follow him. 

“Sure thing, boss.” The man said, moving around Zhao Zi to follow Tang Yi. They went into Tang Yi’s back office, which Zhao Zi had only been to once, during his interview. It was a beautiful room, decorated in splendorous dark woods and emerald accents. It was truly a gentlemen’s den. Zhao Zi let out a breath and pushed through the doors to the dining room to see how he could help.

\---

Hong Ye wasn’t necessarily mean when she told someone off, but rather she was incisive. She chose her words carefully, ensuring that each word held its own weight and cut the person to their core. 

She gazed about the dining room in disgust. 

“So far we have fallen in our standards it would seem,” she said in an emotionless, measured tone. “Dust on the wine bottles, crumbs on the floor. Wine glasses on the wrong side of the table. Did you think I would not notice?”

She gazed at the staff. A beautiful woman standing at just over five feet, her stature did not stop her from seemingly towering over anyone. She wore a white billowy shirt, with draped arms and simple black pants.

“If you think for a second I would not fire all of you in a heartbeat then I’ve clearly haven’t made myself clear enough. Perhaps I have been too soft.”

The dining room was in a state of slight disarray. They had just changed the decor and some of the details were still being worked out. Zhao Zi liked the new look. Just like their food, the restaurant underwent certain changes to match the style of the new chef.

Looking around Zhao Zi was able to learn a little bit about the chef who would soon join them. Whereas before the restaurant had adopted the sophisticated golds and burnt oranges that matched their emphasis on Thai food, now the room was decorated in swathes of red with accents of greens, yellows and blues. The room took on a more intimate and private feel with dimmer lighting; it invited introspection and commiseration. Zhao Zi was reminded of the temples he and his grandmother would visit while growing up. 

Perhaps the new chef had an affinity for traditional Taiwanese culture? Zhao Zi couldn’t help but feel a slight disappointment. It didn’t seem like they would be getting any exotic foods with this new chef. 

Hong Ye disrupted his thoughts by barking out a list of orders and so they spent the rest of the day fixing up the dining room, rearranging again and again the furniture and decor in order to satisfy Hong Ye’s vision. The restaurant was closed to the public this week in order to prepare for the debut of the new chef, so they worked until Hong Ye was satisfied. 

Sometime later in the evening, collapsing on to a chair, Jun Wei groaned, “I am so tired. Man, at least we get to eat.”

That was another perk of working at Trapped. All new chefs cooked a full meal for the wait staff thereby making them always the first to fully try the restaurant's new menu. Tang Yi might have been an emotionless, mysterious boss, but he was a good one.

Zhao Zi was nearly bouncing in his seat; he was always excited when it came to trying out the new menu. He often raced home afterwards to update his food blog. He wrote his thoughts and feelings about the food, tried to describe the flavors accurately and fairly and described how the decor tied in with the food and the mood it established. He was careful to not post his accounts until after the restaurant debuted its new chef to the public; he wrote anonymously and was careful to avoid any details that would identify him as one of the staff.

Zhao Zi had quite a following. He received a lot of correspondence from newspapers and magazines inviting him to join their staff or asking for an interview. It was tempting, but Zhao Zi truly loved his coworkers and the ability to have an inside look at the unique restaurant. He loved watching it come together, each piece necessary to its core: Tang Yi’s curation of staff, Hong Ye’s organization, the kitchen staff’s passion and the waitstaff’s excellence. Each review he wrote about the restaurant was like a letter of deep appreciation to his family, because at the end of the day, that’s what they were. The reviews, however, did not shy away from critiquing the food, and were honest about any faults that were found.

Hong Ye thanked them for their hard work and instructed them to sit down. It was time. From the kitchen doors came first Tang Yi who somehow still managed to look put together and unaffected after a long day of work. Behind him came the new chef.

It was the red-haired man.

Zhao Zi’s eyes widened as he took in the new chef’s apparel. He wore a black chef’s jacket with a red trim that seemed as if it had been tailored. It hugged his body like a glove, showing off his athletic form. The man walked casually behind Tang Yi, a casual smirk in place. They stood at the head of the dining room. 

“Thank you all for your hard work today.” Tang Yi began his speech, his deep voice carried across the room. He truly had an impenetrable expression. The only time Zhao Zi had seen him crack a smile was with Hong Ye and even that had happened three years ago. “In order to thank you for bringing his vision to life and for the future work on which you will embark together, our new chef has created a menu for us to dine on tonight. You will find the new menu in the booklets in front of you. Please order as you wish.”

The first dinner with the staff was not only a thank you, but also a test to the new chef. It was their chance to command the kitchen fully. They hired extra wait staff for the occasion so that Trapped’s staff could enjoy their meal. As a reward for the night's hard-work, Tang Yi would in turn treat the kitchen staff to dinner at some of the leading restaurants in Taiwan. Cold he was, but benevolent.

“Before you start, our chef would like to say a few words.”

The redhead stepped up beside Tang Yi and greeted them all with a grin. “Hello,” he said, his voice smooth, low, and rich. Zhao Zi swore he heard some of the women and men swoon in response. Yi Qi’s cheeks immediately turned bright red. He himself even felt a slight swooping sensation in his stomach that he decidedly ignored.

“My name is Jack. You may refer to me as Chef Jack.”

Jack was an odd name. Zhao Zi wondered whether the chef had spent some time abroad. Plus, did he not have a last name?

“Today I have prepared a traditional Taiwanese menu, with my own personal touches. I hope you enjoy it.”

He nodded and led the way back to the kitchen to start the service.

“Taiwanese, huh,” Yi Qi said as they all turned back to the table. A low murmur was already filling the room. They opened the menu and were scandalized. “But...but this looks like the kind of food you would get at a corner shop! Why would anyone want to pay top dollar for this?”

Zhao Zi had to agree. The menu items weren’t particularly exciting, but perhaps the execution would be. He settled for a bowl of beef noodle soup. You could tell a lot about a chef by how they executed the simplest of dishes. Beef noodle soup was common, but every restaurant and food-stand had their own closely guarded recipe that made the dish their own. Zhao Zi was interested to see the chef’s take on it. 

Orders taken, the team settled into their seats, wine in hand. 

“I wonder what made Tang Yi go for this guy,” Yi Qi questioned. She lifted the glass of white wine to her lips. “Has anyone ever heard of him? At least we had heard about the others.” She looked at Zhao Zi in particular, seeing as he was the one who always displayed more knowledge about the industry.

“No,” he shrugged. “But Tang Yi has never failed us before..” 

Jun Wei peered at him. “You are not as excited about this menu as I’ve seen you be at other times.”

Zhao Zi laughed. “Yeah, it’s a bit difficult to be excited about something I can get anywhere. Plus no one can beat my grandma’s beef noodle soup. Not even a top chef, or whatever this guy is.”

“You sure?” Jun Wei challenged, a growing grin taking over his face. He nodded towards the food that was now exiting the kitchen. “We will find out soon enough.”

When Zhao Zi’s beef noodle soup was set in front of him, he couldn’t help but feel a little impressed. Plating up an appealing looking soup was always a challenge and the chef’s arrangement of this one was stunning. The broth was dark and rich, contrasting greatly with the white noodles. The bok choy was a deep green and accented by the light green scallions sprinkled across the top. The beef was sliced thinly and served on top of the noodles. Zhao Zi saw hints of red flakes, indicating the soup would come with heat.

He stuck his chopstick in and pulled out a wad of noodles. They were well cooked with a slight firmness. Zhao Zi brought the noodles to his mouth.

A moan escaped him.

Jun Wei and Yi Qi stopped and looked at him with raised eyebrows. Zhao Zi flushed a deep red, quickly chewing up the noodles.

“That good, huh,” Jun Wei laughed.

Zhao Zi nodded, but had no words. He continued to dig into the soup, enjoying the tenderness of the beef contrasted by the structural fidelity of the noodles. The hint of licorice flavor in the soup was perfect and there was something else, something Zhao Zi couldn’t pinpoint quite just yet, that tied the whole thing together. 

His grandmother had been an expert at making beef noodle soup. She had her own recipe and made it for him constantly. It was his comfort food. So he wondered what was the story behind this meal. Despite its clear appeal to the palette, a symphony of tasty perfection, he felt something was missing. Something that told a story and gave a hint as to who Jack was. 

The team enjoyed their meal. Yi Qi praised her vermicelli oyster soup and Jun Wei had a second order of soup dumplings. 

“Well I guess you were right. Tang Yi didn’t let us down. That was amazing,” Yi Qi said. “The public won’t know what hit them.”

After dinner, they always completed anonymous surveys that were given to the chef. While he knew most of the staff praised the food, he often tried to give good constructive criticism. For his beef noodle soup, he wrote: Amazing soup with a deep, rich flavor and delightful hint of licorice. A flavorful adventure. However, I can’t help but wonder, where’s the story? What are you trying to say?

Zhao Zi knew that previous chefs had never responded to their critiques. Oftentimes they thought themselves above the staff, an unfortunate result of early career success and zero-humility. He wondered if this chef would be the same.

When he got home that night, he stepped into his house and felt...alone. Putting his things away, Zhao Zi slipped into his pajamas, a big t-shirt and soft sweat pants before walking over to the little alter he kept for his grandmother and lighting a candle for her. “Nǎinai, I had some pretty amazing beef soup today. World class,” he whispered to her. “It still wasn’t as good as yours.” He bowed his head and stood up, making his way upstairs to bed.

\---  
Back in the kitchen, Jack looked over the survey responses that had been submitted by the waitstaff. A lot of them expressed the fact that they had been surprised at the simplicity of the menu, but were blown away by the food. Good. Jack liked surprising people with the unexpected. 

He knew he didn’t necessarily carry himself like a professional chef, and that he was relatively unknown and would therefore be put under a lot of scrutiny, but Jack had no doubts that he would succeed in impressing the public. He would settle for nothing less.

“How did the staff take it?” Tang Yi asked, slipping into the seat next to him.

“I seem to have pleasantly surprised them.”

“I expect you to do the same to the critics.”

“I will, boss,” Jack affirmed. He pulled out one of the survey cards, “Do you know who this is?” Jack asked. Tang Yi took the card and read through it. 

He smirked. 

“What is your story then?”

Jack smiled back, coyly taking back the card and slipping it into his pocket. Tang Yi and him had met under unconventional circumstances. Tang Yi did not know much about Jack’s background, no one did, but in their time of interaction he grew to realize that Jack was amazing in the kitchen. Now he was using that to his advantage.

Jack stood and lazily saluted Tang Yi before slipping through the kitchen doors.


	2. Chapter 2

Zhao Zi was nervous. He always was when they debuted a new chef to the public. He didn’t know why he was personally affected by it; perhaps because he viewed the team as a family and wanted everyone to do well and be praised for the amazing job they did. 

The restaurant was full. The rich, celebrities, and critics all came out to experience the new _Trapped_ with Jack at the helm of the kitchen. The excitement was palpable. Jack’s identity had been revealed to the public the day after the staff had dined on the new menu, and the media went wild trying to find more information about him. Zhao Zi had followed the updates closely, and watched as the public quickly realized that not much could be found on the man.

The week before the debut, Jack was seen daily in the kitchen, conducting the staff, helping them perfect their command of his recipes and ensuring that their plating technique for different dishes fit his standards. 

Just like the kitchen staff, the waitstaff had some work of their own. They had to learn the new dishes and their ingredients by memory, learn how to serve some items table-side and what wines went with certain foods. Zhao Zi generally found it all to be exciting.

When he had the opportunity, Zhao Zi would try to sneak views of the kitchen staff at work. Today, he had watched Jack shuck some oysters with an agility and elegance that bespoke his abilities. Zhao Zi was sure that Jack had caught him watching. That is if the innocent smirk that had appeared on his face was anything to go by.

Now, during opening night, however, Zhao Zi shook off his thoughts of Jack. He needed to concentrate on the customers and ensure they had a wonderful experience. Hong Ye had shown she trusted him by placing some of the top known critics in his section. 

He grabbed his small leather-covered notepad used for taking orders and went to his first table. Chen Su Wei, a formidable and well-respected Taiwanese food critic was seated there with her husband. Zhao Zi had waited on her multiple times before.

“Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. Chen. How are you this evening?” Zhao Zi asked.

“We’re fine, dear. Thank you,” she greeted him familiarly. “But please explain to me what is going on here,” she said, indicating towards the menu. 

“Is there something wrong?” He looked frowned scanning the menu to see if it had been misprinted or perhaps soiled.

“Well, I didn’t know I was coming to dine at a food-stand. Beef noodles and soup dumplings?”

Ah.

Zhao Zi smiled indulgently. “Mrs. Chen, I know it looks odd, especially for our clients who are used to our menus reaching out towards the world outside of Taiwan. But give it a chance! I promise, it will be worth it.”

Mrs. Chen sighed and pursed her red-tinted lips. “Well...I guess, I will start off with these potstickers and then...I’ll have the beef noodle soup. Let’s see how the chef fairs with these simple dishes.”

Zhao Zi grinned, “Those are excellent choices and I can assure you our chef is up for the challenge! The beef noodles are delicious, and have quite a unique flavor profile. It has a hint of licorice and strikes a perfect balance between sweetness and heat. My grandma would probably— ”

He cut himself off and grew red.

“I apologize Mrs. Chen! I got carried away. Please forgive me,” he said bowing towards her.

She quirked her lip upwards in an almost smile.

“It’s alright. It is clear to me that you have enjoyed the dish. I look forward to it.”

Zhao Zi nodded and hastily went to put their order in before coming back with a complimentary bottle of wine to apologize for his rudeness. He made sure to not slip up at any of his other tables and watched with a certain satisfaction as Mrs. Chen dug into her beef noodle soup. She had a great poker face, but Zhao Zi had seen how quickly the first mouthful of broth had been followed by the second. He hoped that his inability to shut up in time had not soured her night or her future review. 

Later on in the night, during his break, Zhao Zi went into the kitchen and sat at the table in the back. He had a clear view of Jack, who was confidently calling out orders from the pass. Zhao Zi watched him and then turned his attention to Jun Wei. Jun Wei was versatile and could work both the kitchen and the front of the house. Today he was working in the confectionery line, filling in for a line cook who had unfortunately fallen ill.

Turning back to Jack, Zhao Zi was surprised to see he was not where he had been and the sous chef had taken over the pass.

“Looking for me, shorty?” said a voice next to him and Zhao Zi jumped nearly a mile in the air. He turned to find Jack grinning at him...and standing way too close for comfort.

“I...uh...no!” Zhao Zi denied. He was mortified!

Jack took the seat in front of him and continued to stare. Zhao Zi bit his lip nervously. “Shouldn’t you...uh...be in there with the crew. You know...cooking or at the pass?”

“If they break down the minute I am out of the kitchen then I haven’t been a very good head chef now, have I?”

“I suppose not,” Zhao Zi murmured. He was unsure of what to say, but it seemed like Jack was content to just sit there and gaze at him. He didn’t know why. It wasn’t as if he was particularly interesting. 

“I...uh… I have to go now. Good luck, tonight!” Zhao Zi squeaked, cutting his break short and nearly running out of the kitchen. He blew past the kitchen doors and into Hong Ye’s line of sight. She glared at him for entering the dining area so ungracefully. Zhao Zi apologized with a quick bow, took out his notepad and went back to work.

After the close, Jun Wei and Zhao Zi packed up and headed out together. Jun Wei had his arm around Zhao Zi, leading the way.

“Hey, what happened earlier with Chef Jack? Why did you run out of the kitchen?”

Zhao Zi sighed. “Nothing, I was being silly.”

Jun Wei seemed unsatisfied with the answer but did not push it.

“How is it working with him?” Zhao Zi asked.

“Well...he is an oddball," Jun Wei said with a light chuckle. "I don’t know why he keeps smiling, but it kind of creeps me out. That’s the main weird thing about him. And I’d have that over flying knives any day.”

Zhao Zi giggled and shrugged him off as Jun Wei stopped by his car. He lived on the other side of the city, whereas Zhao Zi normally walked home. 

A motorcycle sped passed them, too loud in the night. Zhao Zi watched as it sped down the street and disappeared around a corner. 

“See you tomorrow, Jun Wei.”

“Goodnight, Zhao Zi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment with your thoughts!


	3. Chapter 3

A month had passed since Jack’s arrival at Trapped and he was bored. Or rather he was bored with routine and needed to shake things up a bit.

Trapped’s menu had surprised and impressed the public. Jack thought back to the review by Chen Su Wei who had praised his beef noodle soup, calling it a “delightful wonder.” Being praised by a top critic was a welcome surprise, but for Jack it had been...well...nice. What had surprised him about the review was the little anecdote that the critic had given about what had led to her choices. She spoke of her waiter who had been unable to contain himself in praise for the soup, “blushing prettily,” as she described it, “when he felt he had over spoken.” She applauded the restaurant for not only having a kitchen staff that exuded a love for food, but a waitstaff that exhibited the same as well.

Having asked Hong Ye about the identity of that waiter, Jack came to know that it had been the waiter who always stared at him in wonder.

Zhao Zi. 

He looked across the room where Zhao Zi sat with his colleagues, as they took a moment’s break before dinner service. Well he did say he wanted things to be more interesting. And Zhao Zi was interesting.

He straightened up and walked over to the group. They didn’t notice until he slotted into the empty space that closed the circle they had formed.

Zhao Zi immediately shut up and stared at him nervously. 

“Hello, shorty,” he grinned. Ah there was the blush. He felt the other staff shift around the circle, suddenly uncomfortable. “I wondered if you had a moment of time to help me with something.”

Zhao Zi looked confused. “With what?”

“Well, I am working on a new dessert and wondered if I could have your opinion on it. After all, Mrs. Chen thinks highly of you and your opinion. It would be silly of me not to ask.”

Zhao Zi shrunk into himself and pouted. “I’m so sorry about that! I didn’t mean for my actions to hijack an article about you—”

“Oh no need to apologize! I couldn’t care less about such matters.”

He put on his most charming grin. “So…,” he said leaning in a little towards the man. He noticed another cook, Jun Wei, shift to stand taller as if prepared to come in between them. “Will you help me?” 

Zhao Zi nodded timidly and yelped when Jack pulled him towards his work station and shoved a plate in front of him. Zhao Zi looked at the plate. On it golden-brown tart which clean crisp edges and topped pear slices, powdered sugar and a dollop of mascarpone. 

“Have a bite,” Jack insisted.

Zhao Zi looked at him quickly before he took his fork, cut a slice, and raised the tart to his lips. He chewed continuously tasting the ingredients and deciphering what went into the tart batter. Almonds? No, there was a slight kick. Definitely amaretto. 

Zhao Zi swallowed. “That was great!” Zhao Zi said enthusiastically. “Can I have more?”

“Only if you tell me what ingredients I used to make it,” Jack said, pulling the plate away from Zhao Zi just as he was about to fork off another piece. 

“Jack!” he giggled. “That’s not fair!”

“Guess!”

“Ok, ok! You’re so controlling! There was the usual, flour, eggs, sugar, butter...uh vanilla extract and pears...um..mascarpone...ginger...and definitely amaretto!”

Jack was impressed. “You’re good, shorty.”

“Stop calling me that!” Zhao Zi said automatically. “I know I’m short. You don’t have to remind me!”

Jack grinned and ruffled his hair, which made Zhao Zi turn beet red. It didn’t help when Hong Ye stuck her head into the kitchen and screamed at him to get his butt into the dining room and for the love of god please fix his hair before he did so. Zhao Zi patted down his hair quickly, scrambling to get to the front room. He threw a glare at Jack over his shoulder which made Jack laugh.

Perhaps things could still get interesting after all.

\--

Zhao Zi didn’t know how he had managed to capture Jack’s attention, but since that day Jack constantly asked for his opinions on random treats and dishes he would make. It seemed that Jack, despite now being known for his Taiwanese delights, was well-versed in different cuisines. He would often serve Zhao Zi French pastries and even introduced him to some Caribbean dishes that Zhao Zi had never heard of. Tang Yi allowed him to experiment in the kitchen, mindful of the costs of course, and often these experiments ended up in the stomachs of the staff. Or rather Zhao Zi.

Jun Wei was suspicious.

“What exactly does he want from you?” he asked after he returned from having been pulled away by Jack to taste the broth for a soup he had been experimenting with. 

“My opinion on his food,” Zhao Zi shrugged and Jun Wei just shook his head. 

A few days later as he and Jun Wei walked towards his car before they split ways, a motorcycle pulled up next to them; the driver removed his sleek helmet. It was Jack.

“Zhao Zi,” he greeted with a grin. He nodded to Jun Wei, acknowledging his presence. “How about I take you home?”

Zhao Zi shook his head. “Oh, I don’t live far from here! There’s no need!”

“Certainly, there is” Jack said, already putting his helmet back on and moving forward on his bike to allow Zhao Zi room. “Hop on." Zhao Zi went with it since it didn’t seem he had much of a choice. It would be cool to ride on the bike even for a short distance. It was clearly fast. Plus, Jack really didn’t seem to mind.

He told Jack his address and had just enough time to wave goodbye to Jun Wei before Jack lurched forward into the night. Zhao Zi instinctively wrapped his hand around Jack’s waist and held on for dear life. ‘This can’t be the speed limit,’ Zhao Zi thought wildly as the houses around them grew blurry.

They arrived at his home in three minutes time, deterred only by one traffic light. Jack removed his helmet and peered up at his house. The house was small but had great big windows that allowed one to look into the living room and kitchen and bedroom upstairs. The blinds shuttered the space from the outside.

“Do you live here alone?” Jack asked, kicking his kickstand into place and removing his helmet. His red hair was slightly mussed. 

‘Cute’ Zhao Zi thought, before quickly shaking off that wild thought. What was wrong with him? 

He opened the gate and led the way up the small walkway towards his house. Jack followed.

“Yes. I used to live with my grandma, but she passed away two years ago, so it’s just been me. Sometimes my best friend Shao Fei stays with me, but he’s away now doing police work.”

Jack _hmmed_ still staring up at the home, before focusing back on Zhao Zi with a grin. “Shorty, do you want hot chocolate?”

Zhao Zi laughed. “You are so weird! Did you just invite yourself into my house?”

Jack grinned. "You said you liked it. I assume you have the ingredients?"

Zhao Zi smiled at that. He had mentioned it long ago, but Jack had remembered. He opened the door and walked into his home, turning on the lights as he went. A soft warm light bathed the room. His home was decorated exactly how his grandma had left it. She had been a woman that enjoyed a simple, homey style.

Dropping off his stuff in the living room, Zhao Zi turned to find Jack peering at his shelves that held a lot of knickknacks. His eyes ran along the stuff, seemingly fascinated. Then he saw the small altar Zhao Zi had made for his grandma.

“Is this the famous Nǎi nai?”

“Yes!”

He nodded and bowed to the alter to show deference. Zhao Zi was touched. He cleared his throat. 

“I thought you came here to make me hot chocolate, not poke through my things!”

Jack turned towards the kitchen and began searching through the cabinets. He pulled out the ingredients necessary and began heating up the milk and mixing some cinnamon into the chocolate mix. 

Zhao Zi settled at the small table near the window and watched Jack for a while. Jack seemed content in the silence, but it made Zhao Zi a little nervous.

“So...what did you do before you came to work at Trapped?”

Jack tinkered with some of the stuff in the kitchen before responding. “I was in Cambodia.”

“Oh?” Zhao Zi said. “My friend Shao Fei is there! What were you doing there?”

Jack brought over two mugs of hot chocolate and a plate of lightly toasted buttered bread that Zhao Zi had not noticed him making. 

“Here,” said handing one of the mugs over, with a quirk of his lip. “Tell me if you like it.”

“It would be pretty embarrassing for you if you somehow messed up hot chocolate,” Zhao Zi laughed. He brought the cup to his lips and took a sip and promptly closed his eyes in ecstasy. “How can you make hot chocolate taste so good?”

Jack looked pleased. He sat across from Zhao Zi. “So, shorty. What do you think of my food?”

“Are you fishing for compliments?” Zhao Zi teased.

“Perhaps.”

“Well I compliment you every time you ask me my opinion on whatever concoction you have come up with! Maybe you should compliment me for a change!” Zhao Zi joked.

Jack raised an eyebrow. “Would you like that?”

Zhao Zi’s cheeks reddened. “No..I..I was just joking. You don’t have to.”

Jack put his mug down and leaned forward across the table. “You blush prettily,” he said. “I think that was the truest part of Ms. Chen’s article.”

“Jack!”

“I like listening to you. I like hearing your opinion about my food. You really think through what you say about the dishes.” 

He leaned back and pulled a note card from his pocket. “Was this you?” he asked, handing the note card to Zhao Zi. Zhao Zi grabbed it and took a look. It was the review he had made the first night Jack had cooked for the staff. “Yes, I wrote this. I...uh...hope you weren’t offended! Why are you carrying this around anyway?”

Jack settled back. “So it was you. I wondered.” He tucked it away in his pocket again. “It was an interesting take on my food. What’s your story? I’ve thought about that a lot recently.”

Zhao Zi wasn’t sure what to say. Jack was an enigma. He was never sure what thoughts lay behind his actions and words. 

He leaned forward towards him. “I didn’t mean to trouble you! I just...whenever my grandma cooked, her emotions and personality came out in her food. I don’t get that from you. I know you are an amazing cook and can tease a palette like no other...but what do you feel when you cook?”

“Nothing,” Jack said honestly.

Zhao Zi let out a breath of disappointment.

Jack continued, “Well before it was nothing. Now I feel excitement because I am cooking for you.”

He reached across the table to graze a thumb over Zhao Zi’s hand.

Zhao Zi’s eyes grew wide and he snatched his hand back. His stomach churned with nerves; Jack’s eyes remained steadily on him. 

“I didn’t mean to offend you, shorty.”

Zhao Zi cleared his throat and downed the rest of the hot chocolate. “You didn’t,” he blurted out. I just...I think it’s getting late! I will see you on Thursday!” he scrambled up and away thundering upstairs and remaining there until he heard Jack finish putting their dishes in the sink, clean up and leave.


	4. Chapter 4

‘Perhaps I was too honest,’ Jack thought two days later as he threw some more shallots into the pan.

He deftly stirred the fried rice, and once fully cooked, brought the dish up to the pass for his sous-chef to plate. When deep in thought, he preferred to take on the role of a line-cook. Cooking came practically second-nature to him. Working on dishes allowed him time to think about many things, like the fact that it had been two days since Zhao Zi had come to work.

Jack went back to his station. As he prepared his pan for the next table's order he looked over at Jun Wei stationed to his right.

Jun Wei was talented and had a decent handling on the restaurant's dishes. He was known to slightly under-season at times, but not so much that it was detrimental to the integrity of the dish. The man was very suspicious and uncomfortable around Jack. Jack smiled inwardly at that, enjoying his ability to make someone uneasy while not doing anything threatening. It was a skill that had served him well in his previous line of work.

Jun Wei glanced up at him and frowned when he caught him staring. He shifted uneasily.

“Am I doing something wrong?”

Jack smirked. Just one look from him brought the man’s confidence levels down so many notches.

“Not at all.”

He added a pinch more of salt to the pan Jun Wei was working on just to mess with him a little. Well...and also because he had watched him season the dish and it clearly needed it.

“I wonder, do you know where our friend Zhao Zi has been?”

Jun Wei’s eyes narrowed, and he set his stirring spoon aside turning fully towards Jack. “He asked for a few days off.”

Jack _hmm’d_. He did vaguely recall Zhao Zi calling out a “See you Thursday!” last time they had spoken. He concluded his absence from work had been planned beforehand. A modicum of relief washed over him. Perhaps he had not scared Zhao Zi off entirely.

“Why do you want to know?”

Jack didn’t respond which seemed to infuriate Jun Wei. The cook abruptly turned back to his dish, handling the ingredients a bit more aggressively than before. 

Jack remained unsure of whether Jun Wei actually liked Zhao Zi or whether he was just being overprotective. Jack himself still remained unsure of what his ultimate goal was in pursuing the short man. Sure he was cute and innocent--‘Perhaps too much so,’ Jack thought--but he couldn't quite place the reason he found himself attracted to him. Zhao Zi wasn’t the type he typically found himself attracted to; admittedly, the life he had led before becoming a chef hadn’t exactly brought him into contact with people that both fit Zhao Zi's personality and lived long enough for Jack to take notice. 

Zhao Zi running off after his confession had been a bit of a blow to his ego. He was not often one to suffer rejection from someone he had set his sights on. But it had not been entirely a rejection, had it? 'See you, Thursday,' he had said. Zhao Zi still wanted to see him after all. 

Jack figured giving Zhao Zi some space to sort out his thoughts would be best. Zhao Zi's little vacation had come in perfect timing.

Refocusing on the station in front of him, he grabbed the bottle of oil and squirted it into the wok.

He looked forward to Thursday.

\---

On Tuesday of that week, the day after Jack had visited his home, Zhao Zi picked up his buddy Meng Shao Fei from the airport. Shao Fei was just returning from Cambodia. He was staying with Zhao Zi for a few days before moving into his own apartment. The pair had met at university and had become fast friends. Their paths had diverged afterwards: Shao Fei went on to join the police academy while Zhao Zi had stayed home to take care of his grandma.

Shao Fei was a tall, broad-shouldered man with an awkward haircut and one errant tuft of hair that would not lay flat. In college, a lot of women had thought it was adorable. He had become a top talent at the academy and within his field.

When they got back to his apartment, Zhao Zi quickly set Shao Fei up in the guest room. Afterward, Shao Fei crashed onto his couch and made himself comfortable while Zhao Zi started cooking some noodles. 

“What have you been up to?” Zhao Zi asked with a glance over his shoulder as he prepared the ingredients and began to boil water.

“Well, I was deep in the drug-trafficking world for a bit, cooperating with an international investigations team on a case involving trafficking between here and Cambodia.”

Shao Fei readily accepted the can of coke Zhao Zi handed to him to keep his stomach entertained while the noodles cooked.

“I liked the work, but it was tough,” he remarked, voice filled with frustration. “Some people got away with their crimes because they served as informants.” 

Zhao Zi knew Shao Fei did not like when the justice system failed to punish those who clearly deserved it. He didn’t believe in cutting deals or leniency for those who had done some serious wrong. Zhao Zi had sat through enough of his rants about criminals to gather that for Shao Fei, the world was pretty black and white. Zhao Zi liked to believe that most people who had done wrong should have the opportunity to redeem themselves. Perhaps they had done wrong because they had saw no other choice. If they finally figured out their wrongdoings and were taking steps to correct them, then why should the world continuously beat them down?

He kept this all to himself. He didn't exactly want to get Shao Fei started on one of his rants.

“I’m sure you did your best,” Zhao Zi commented.

Shao Fei smiled a little. “Tell me what is going on with you, Zhao Zi?”

Zhao Zi brought their bowls over to the table. Shao Fei grabbed another can of coke from the fridge before joining him. They sat down and Zhao Zi watched in horror as Shao Fei added a tremendous amount of spice to the already spicy noodles. Zhao Zi could never understand the point in eating overly spiced foods. There was no enjoyment of the nuance in flavor when the spice superseded it all.

“Well I work at a restaurant here in the city. It’s called _Trapped_.”

Shao Fei put his chopsticks down and looked at him. Zhao Zi immediately knew he had said something wrong.

“You mean the one run by Tang Yi?”

“Yes..."

“Zhao Zi, you need to quit. Now.”

Zhao Zi’s jaw dropped.

“What!? Why?”

“Tang Yi is a bad man. He is a former gangster! Didn't you know that?”

So the rumors are true, Zhao Zi thought. He couldn’t help but think, however, that the Tang Yi Shao Fei seemed to know, and the Tang Yi Zhao Zi had observed over the last few years didn't seem to be the same.

“I mean I had heard rumors, but...well...he doesn’t seem very dangerous to me. He treats us quite well-”

“-His restaurant is probably a drug front!”

“Didn’t you say he was a _former_ gangster?”

“That’s what he wants us to think!”

Zhao Zi sighed.

“No, no I think it’s legitimate. He and his restaurant are quite famous here in Taiwan and internationally. People from all over the world come to dine with us!”

“A great cover,” Shao Fei surmised. He picked up his chopsticks again and pointed them at Zhao Zi. “You need to be careful. I am telling you now, he is not a good person. He has seen men be killed and probably has hurt a few of his own.”

Zhao Zi shrugged helplessly. “I can’t quit! It would be crazy to quit a job in the service industry with so many benefits.”

Shao Fei chewed in silence as he mewled it over. “Let’s go eat there tomorrow.”

“What!? Shao Fei, the food costs so much! I’m lucky they feed me during my break, if not I would never be able to afford to eat there!”

“We’re going,” Shao Fei said with finality. He shoved a wad of red hot noodles into his mouth and chased the heat with some coke, wincing.

Zhao Zi sighed again. There was going to be no convincing Shao Fei otherwise.

\---

The next day, things went south the minute they entered the restaurant. Hong Ye looked up from her list of lunch reservations surprised to see him there on his day off. She was about to comment when her eyes shifted over to his companion. They narrowed instantly.

“Officer Meng. What a displeasure. I thought I had seen the last of you in Cambodia,” she stated dryly. 

“The feeling is mutual,” Shao Fei responded. Zhao Zi elbowed him in the stomach causing him to grunt in pain. “That’s one of my bosses!” he whispered heatedly, while Shao Fei retorted, "She started it!"

Turning to Hong Ye, he apologized profusely. “I am so sorry! I didn’t realize you...er...had history. Shao Fei has been a friend of mine for a long time. I wanted to show him where I worked! But we will be leaving now.”

He grabbed Shao Fei’s arm and turned to march him out of the restaurant. He would not be taking no for an answer, especially if his job was going to be put in jeopardy all because Shao Fei couldn't behave himself. He began to pull him towards the door when someone called out behind him.

“Shorty!”

Zhao Zi flinched. He knew that voice...and that nickname. He turned slowly to face Jack. What was he doing outside of the kitchen anyway?

“Jack!" Zhao Zi greeted hesitantly as Hong Ye now heatedly reprimanded the chef for calling out in their fine dining establishment. God this whole situation was going downhill fast.

Jack nodded dismissively at Hong Ye, his attention still on Zhao Zi as he approached him.

"What are you doing here. I thought you were off, shorty?"

"Don’t mind me, I...uh...I'm just...aren't you supposed to be in the kitchen?”

Jack laughed, but his gaze turned his attention to the arm Zhao Zi was still clutching and up to that arm's owner. His bright smile cooled considerably.

“Officer Meng,” Jack acknowledged. “It has been a while.”

Jesus this couldn't be happening.

“Wait, you know him?” Zhao Zi questioned.

“We met in Cambodia,” Shao Fei answered shortly.

Zhao Zi was sensing a reoccurring theme.

Jack just smirked at the officer, before gesturing towards the kitchen magnanimously. 

“Well, it seems we have a guest of honor. Officer Meng, would you like to join us in the back to see where all the action is?”

Shao Fei was striding towards the kitchen doors before Zhao Zi even had the chance to decline. He followed hurriedly after him, cursing Jack. It was lunch time, so the kitchen wasn’t nearly as busy as it tended to be during dinner service. Jack waved them over to the area where the staff took their breaks and promised to come back with some treats. His eyes lingered a second longer on Zhao Zi than strictly necessary, and Zhao Zi nervously broke their eye contact to lead Shao Fei to their seats. He caught sight of Jun Wei and waved at him. Jun Wei threw him a confused look, causing Zhao Zi to just shrug helplessly in answer. He would explain later.

Shao Fei looked around, scrutinizing everything as if hoping to find a dime of coke hidden somewhere among the pots and pans. 

“Shao.Fei.” Zhao Zi hissed. “You are being ridiculous!”

“I am not,” Shao Fei said stubbornly. “The police have been chasing Tang Yi and his gang for years now. I know this restaurant can’t be completely legit. And who is he trying to kid,” he said nodding over at Jack who was ladling out some soup for them. “Like he wasn’t mixed up with the rest of the lot just recently.”

That gave Zhao Zi pause. 

“What do you mean?’” He asked, his lips falling into a pout. “Jack has always been really nice to me.”

Shao Fei shook his head. “Don’t fall for his trap, Zhao Zi. He-”

“-is my head chef, Meng Shao Fei, and I would ask you not to speak ill of him or any of the people who work in my establishment.”

Tang Yi stood tall in front of them, eyes narrowed with his lips upturned in apparent distaste. Shao Fei stood and drew himself to his full height as well. He was shorter than Tang-Yi, but still cut an impressive figure. Whereas Tang Yi was elegant and lithe--‘ _Swan-like’_ Zhao Zi had thought one day after a couple of beers--Shao Fei was more built-out.

“I am just informing my friend of what cloth the owners of this restaurant are cut from.”

“No, you are speculating and spreading false rumors. I suggest that you come with me and settle down in my office, Officer Meng,” Tang Yi said tightly.

Shao Fei glared at him but stood up and followed him to the back office.

“Here is your soup,” Jack said, placing a bowl in front of him. Zhao Zi pulled his eyes from the door his boss and Shao Fei has just disappeared into and looked at the bowl. The soup looked wonderful but surprisingly, he wasn’t in the mood to eat.

“Thanks,” he said dejectedly, picking up the spoon anyway. 

Jack sat down next to him.

“Where has Officer Meng run off to?” Jack asked, placing the officer’s meal aside. “Has he found the coke stash yet?”

“Jack!” Zhao Zi exclaimed, smacking Jack on the bicep. Jack laughed and Zhao Zi went back to frowning grumpily at his soup.

Jack leaned closer, trying to catch his eye. 

“What’s wrong?”

Zhao Zi didn’t want to ask, but he had to know, didn’t he? He trusted that Shao Fei, but whether everything he said was true or not was a different story. 

“You must have heard what Shao Fei said, right? How can I trust you if you are somehow involved in some kind of gang activity?”

Jack shifted, seemingly taken aback. He fixed Zhao Zi with an earnest look.

“What does your heart say?”

“My...my what? I’m being serious, Jack!”

“I am too,” He said, leaning even closer still. Zhao Zi’s breath caught. There was not a hint of humor on Jack's face, an odd departure from the seemingly permanent forever-amused-by-you expression it tended to carry. “What does your heart say?”

That gave Zhao Zi pause. When it came down to it, thinking about how Jack interacted with him, how they got on well, he knew he wanted to trust him and to some degree already did. With Jack, despite his own awkwardness, he never felt judged. He was able to indulge in his love of food and say anything that was on his mind. Jack never seemed to mind and in fact enjoyed feeding him and listening to him. 

Not only that, but if Zhao Zi really wanted to dig in deep, he knew that he often craved the warmth of the closeness Jack was readily willing to give him. He liked it despite the nervous feelings it ignited.

“I want to trust you, Jack,” he admitted with lowered eyes.

“Then trust me, shorty,” Jack said. He lifted Zhao Zi’s chin to get the smaller man to look at him. “I would never intentionally hurt you. I like you. A lot.” 

Cuffing Zhao Zi’s chin lightly, he nodded towards the soup in front of him.

“Your soup is getting cold."

Jack stood and wandered back into the kitchen.

Zhao Zi looked down at his soup with a blush. Tucking into it, he smiled as he thought about Jack’s touches and the fluttery feeling in his stomach that went along with them.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the long wait, this one was a bit difficult to write. I kept on re-editing! Hope you enjoy.

**2 Hot 2** **Handle**

 _Where the hell have you been?_

**REPLY**

Zhao Zi cringed as he read through some of the comments on his food blog. His last restaurant review had been almost a month ago now. Since he started the page a year ago, he had never gone so long without submitting a review for a restaurant or some food establishment. He was usually pretty consistent, making sure to submit at least once a week. He read through some more.

**Fewd.Lover**

_It has been so long since they posted anything! Do you think something happened to them?_

**REPLY**

He scrolled a few comments down.

**Ew.Gross.**

_@Fewd.Lover Maybe they've finally gone broke from reviewing_ Trapped _so often._

**REPLY**

That one had made Zhao Zi chuckle a little. He shut down the computer and laid on his bed with a sigh.

It had been over a month since Shao Fei had come back to Taiwan, weeks since he had moved into his own apartment and since Shao Fei's departure from his home, Zhao Zi had been feeling a bit off-kilter.

At first, he had tried to get back into his routine: a nice balance between work, home, and the occasional hang out.

Home was the first thing he had noticed did not feel the same. Having lived alone for so long, Zhao Zi had thought he would have been accustomed to solitude once Shao Fei left. It was not as if Shao Fei hadn't visited and gone many times before. But weeks after his departure, Zhao Zi's treacherous mind would still come home expecting to hear sounds of life in his space. He had liked coming home to Shao Fei, as messy and loud as he was. 

When his grandma had passed away, it had taken months for him to enter the house expecting to be greeted by silence. So used to hearing the low sound of his grandmother's radio and movements in the kitchen was he that he had felt disorientated for months after her death. For the most part now, he was able to ignore the nagging feeling at the back of his mind that railed against the silence, but lately he hadn't been able to do so.

Zhao Zi had then resolved to throw himself more fully into his work. He picked up shifts for people, often working double shifts, and came home so tired that he could barely shower before tucking himself into bed and falling asleep immediately. If he came home tired, there was less of a chance of him lying awake _thinking_ and _feeling_. 

More than once Jun Wei and Yi Qi had glanced at him questioningly, clearly wondering why he had become such a work-horse. He chose to ignore these looks.

It didn't help that Jack had become a bit of a recluse at work. For a man who Jun Wei had once disparagingly called his shadow, Jack had surprisingly been keeping his distance. He wasn't unfriendly, just not quite as enthusiastic about his attention as before. Though Jack still made sure that he was fed, the casual touches Zhao Zi had grown to enjoy from him had all but vanished. Often, Zhao Zi would find himself watching Jack, a part of him unwilling to admit that he hoped to catch Jack's eye. In times when he did, Jack would offer up an encouraging smile or wink but nothing more.

Zhao Zi wasn't sure what had him feeling so bereft. He should be happy that Jack was finally acknowledging personal space as a basic human right. Yet, it went so against everything Jack had built their friendship up to be that Zhao Zi was left wondering if despite his reassurances, Jack had decided Zhao Zi wasn't worth his time. And god thinking of that on top of everything else _hurt_.

So he tried to stick to his new routine: long work hours. Go home tired. Sleep immediately. Recycle.

Yi Qi approached him as they were setting the dining room for service one afternoon a few weeks later.

“Zhao Zi, are you alright?" she asked him hesitantly, a frown marring her features.

Zhao Zi looked at her. "...Yes?"

"Sorry I ask...I just...you seem to be picking up a lot of shifts lately and...well...you don't seem quite yourself."

Zhao Zi finished setting the table, and turned to her fully. "It's nothing, I'm fine! I promise!"

She did not look convinced, but had clearly decided not to push and for that Zhao Zi was grateful. He didn't enjoy lying to her, but thought it was probably best not to burden her with his silly problems. He would get over it soon anyway. He was sure of it.

"Anyway, Jun Wei and a couple of others are going to a cool, new bar tonight. It's downtown and supposedly pretty popular. Want to come?"

Zhao Zi perked up. 

"Yes!"

Anything for a distraction.

Yi Qi laughed. "Ah, so now you are all excited. Seems to me like you have just been missing the nightlife. If you wanted to go out, then you should've just said something!"

Zhao Zi laughed along with her and turned quickly to go set another table. He had done enough lying for the day. 

\---

Zhao Zi invited Shao Fei to the outing. Yi Qi had been extremely excited about this, as she had developed a bit of a crush on the man after having seen him briefly during his visit to the restaurant. Zhao Zi had heard enough of her gushing about his "cute tuft of hair" to last him a lifetime. He had warned Shao Fei about Yi Qi's crush, but the man had just smiled and shrugged finding it cute, though adamant that he was not interested. Zhao Zi was unsure of how to break the news to Yi Qi.

The bar was underground and had very low lighting. The music was great, a nice mix of upbeat dance music and slower tracks that allowed people to cool off and couples to enjoy a bit of intimacy. The place had only been open for a few months but had already gained a good reputation in terms of drinks, Jun Wei had informed them. 

Perhaps he could review this place for his blog, Zhao Zi thought. He owed them _something_.

Zhao Zi grabbed a lewdly-named mixed drink from the bar to start off his night and headed towards the small, round bar table where they all gathered. They were lucky to have snagged one of the last tables available before the bar had become crowded. 

Everyone was laughing as Shao Fei recounted a silly story of a recent event at the police station. It seemed that a new guy proudly led a force to apprehend what he believed were coke sellers, but in fact were bakers bringing in confectioner’s sugar into their bakery. The station chief had blown a gasket.

Zhao Zi smiled happily when Jun Wei casually wrapped an arm around his shoulders. He leaned into him as he listened to the conversation and drank from his drink. Zhao Zi felt his body content at the touch. He really liked feeling the vibration of Jun Wei's voice when he spoke. It enveloped him in a warm, easy comfort. He looked out across the bar at the crowd of people, some dancing, some drinking and laughing. A couple by the bar caught his eye.

It couldn’t be.

There he was, Tang Yi, speaking and surprisingly laughing with a scantily dressed man. Tang Yi wore a simple, yet elegant and clearly expensive form fitting black turtleneck sweater and pants. The clothes hugged his form as if they were tailored specifically for him, which Zhao Zi didn’t doubt was a strong possibility. The man Tang Yi was speaking to oozed pure sex, so much so that even from across the room Zhao Zi felt himself start to blush. His eyes smoldered, his lips were full and tinted red. He wore a black mesh shirt that exposed his chest teasingly. A tempting black-bowed ribbon lay on his neck. The man’s arms were around Tang Yi's neck and he was leaning towards him, plastering his body against Tang Yi’s front. Tang Yi didn’t seem to mind.

Zhao Zi looked away, not wanting to be caught looking at his boss’s private moment. He wanted to move away from the view entirely, and was just going to suggest the dance floor, when Shao Fei abruptly stopped mid-sentence and stared across the room.

He had spotted Tang Yi too.

For reasons unbeknownst to him, Shao Fei put his bottle down hard on the table, some of the liquid spilling out of the bottle's rim, and marched across the room toward Tang Yi. The others were confused, but Zhao Zi quickly tried to distract them before they noticed their boss or what was going on.

“Ah, he...uh...just needs to go to the bathroom! So how about we go dance? There’s good music here!”

It took them a second to switch gears, but his friends and co-workers agreed and made their way to the crowded dance floor. Zhao Zi lagged behind, glancing over at where Tang Yi had been and found him and Shao Fei gone. The scantily dressed man had moved his attention elsewhere.

He was unsure if he should be relieved or if he should go look for Shao Fei. Having those two gone together couldn't be good, could it?

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for the bar type, shorty.”

Zhao Zi jumped in surprise. He dribbled a bit of his drink down his chin and hastily wiped it away as he turned to look at Jack. When Jack fully came into his view, Zhao Zi couldn’t help but groan. The white T-shirt that pulled across his chest displayed all of his muscles. His hair was purposefully tousled and looked darker in the low lighting. The ever-present smirk was there.

“That’s just unfair,” Zhao Zi said, gesturing at Jack's chest unable to stop his mouth. “No one should be allowed to look that good and have all those muscles.”

Jack's smirk grew; he stepped closer to him and leaned in until his lips brushed Zhao Zi’s ears. “Are you a muscle lover, shorty?”

Zhao Zi shivered, frisson leaving goosebumps down his arm. 

“I can’t grow any of my own,” he managed to stutter out.

Stepping back, Jack gave Zhao Zi a once over. Zhao Zi had gone home and changed into a white button-down shirt, with one side tucked in at the front and the other half hanging loose. He wore soft, herringbone grey pants and white sneakers.

“You look good just as you are.”

Jack took another step back and held out his hand, beckoning him forward.

“Dance with me.”

Zhao Zi loved to dance. He didn’t consider himself particularly graceful, but he loved the energy it allowed him to release. He hadn’t ever danced with a man, but swayed by Jack’s confidence, and perhaps the cocktail he had just finished, he placed his hand in Jack’s and allowed himself to be taken to the middle of the dance floor. The music was upbeat. Zhao Zi joined the crowd in bouncing and moving and just letting it all out. He closed his eyes and just let the music control his body.

Whenever he glanced at Jack, he found Jack staring back.

The music slowed down. Zhao Zi opened his eyes when he felt Jack pull him in closer from behind.

“Is this, ok?” Jack said into his ear.

Zhao Zi laid his head back into Jack’s chest and nodded. They were moving together in way that made a rose color spill onto Zhao Zi's cheeks. Jack’s arms were wrapped around Zhao Zi’s waist and Zhao Zi had his hands placed on top of his. Zhao Zi could feel Jack’s breath on his neck, warm and soft and the fluttery feeling in his stomach rose to his chest as it often did with Jack.

'God,' thought Zhao Zi. If he could just bottle the feeling of being in Jack's arms, the exciting rush of it that softened into a serene warmth, maybe he wouldn't feel as alone as he often did.

Jack's lips brushed against his throat causing Zhao Zi to gasp. As the song ended, he bit his lip and turned to look up at Jack. Jack brushed his hair out of his eyes, bringing his hand down to run a thumb across Zhao Zi’s mouth, getting him to release his lip from his teeth.

“Zhao Zi!” said a voice behind him.

Zhao Zi closed his eyes and inhaled sharply. Jack released him, and Zhao Zi ached. He reluctantly turned to face whoever had called him.

Yi Qi waved at him and then took notice of the man behind him. “Chef Jack! I didn’t know you would be here!”

Jack placed a hand at Zhao Zi's lower back and steered him towards his friends who had congregated at the table again. Jun Wei glared as Jack approached and reached out to pull Zhao Zi towards him. Zhao Zi was disappointed at being pulled from Jack’s reach. He knew Jun Wei was being protective, but Zhao Zi could take care of himself.

“Hello,” Jack greeted. He stared at Jun Wei with a pompous smirk. “I was just leaving when I spotted Zhao Zi and had to get a dance in. You all enjoy yourselves.”

“Do you have to go?” Zhao Zi blurted out, the color high on his cheeks.

Jack smiled.

“It was great dancing with you tonight, shorty.”

He nodded towards the others and turned towards the exit. Zhao Zi watched him go, the heavy feeling in his chest deepening.

Yi Qi squealed. “Zhao Zi, Chef Jack really seems to like you!”

Jun Wei scoffed, “Yeah, well I say don’t trust him. Who knows what he actually wants.”

Zhao Zi frowned. Was it so impossible to believe that Jack wanted to spend time with him because he enjoyed Zhao Zi's company?

His chest grew tighter.

Zhao Zi pulled out of Jun Wei's grasp and turned to leave, ignoring their wails to come back. He was fed up with everything. With the loneliness he felt at home, with the nervousness Jack often made him feel. Who knows where Shao Fei ended up tonight? Frankly, at this moment, he didn’t care. He had been trying so hard to not let his feelings show, but he was barely holding on. The tightness in his chest made breathing difficult and tears sprung at the corner of his eyes.

He took a cab home trying hard not to break. He felt helpless. Once in his home, he closed the door, threw his shoes off and ran to his grandmother's altar.

“Nai Nai, I don’t know what to do,” he muttered. He was met with silence. Typical.

He decided perhaps a shower would help. When he climbed into bed, he felt moderately better, but his thoughts continued to race bringing him a night of fitful sleep.

\---

Zhao Zi jerked awake. He sat up and squinted around the room, wondering what had woken him. He couldn’t remember having a nightmare. Looking at the time on the analog clock he kept on his night table, he groaned. It was 3:00 AM.

A clatter sounded at his window, and he turned to look at it. He had forgotten to close the curtains. The sound came again, accompanied clearly by the view of a couple of pebbles hitting against the glass. Frowning Zhao Zi pulled away the covers and went to look outside. 

Down in his small front yard was Jack. Was this a dream?

Zhao Zi opened the window in shock. “What are you doing here, Jack? It’s three in the morning!”

Jack just grinned, not a wink of tiredness could be found on his features. “Aren’t you going to let me in, shorty?”

Zhao Zi laughed incredulously. If anyone else had come to his house at three in the morning, barring an emergency, he would have considered it a bit rude. In fact, for anyone else it would have been inconceivable. But this was Jack.

Zhao Zi pulled away from the window and hurried downstairs. He opened the door. Jack had changed into a dark leather jacket, and shirt combo. He took one look at Zhao Zi and pulled him into a hug.

Zhao Zi gasped in surprise, but immediately fell into his arms with a sigh and clung on. He needed this, needed it so much like air.

Jack maneuvered them into the house and sat on the couch. Zhao Zi gave up on decorum and curled into his lap, laying his head on the crook of his neck as Jack ran a hand through his hair, the other softly running along the sweatpants covering his thighs. 

Zhao Zi knew he should be questioning all of this. It was three in the morning and Jack had shown up. No words had been spoken between them since he had opened the door, and yet here his was in Jack's arms, yearning for his warmth like a limpet. Perhaps he should feel ashamed at his actions, but he had been feeling so off over the past few weeks and this is the first time he felt _right_.

“Sorry,” Zhao Zi eventually muttered into Jack's neck.

Jack placed a kiss on the top of his head in response. "No need to apologize, shorty."

His house wasn't silent anymore. He could so clearly hear the sound of Jack's soft breaths and the trump of his heartbeat.

How was it that Jack knew he needed this? Had he noticed that Zhao Zi was spiraling? Did he mind that Zhao Zi, when he allowed himself to fully give in to his desires, was clingy and needy and attention-seeking? 

As if sensing that he was beginning to overthink, Jack placed another kiss at his temple and whispered, "Just be here with me." 

Zhao Zi wasn’t sure how long they sat there, but Jack eventually ruffled his hair.

“Need to feed you,” he muttered.

Zhao Zi pulled away to stare at him nonplussed. He supposed now that he thought about it, he did feel a bit famished. He hadn’t eaten much before going to the bar. It was funny the way Jack just entered his space and commanded it. Even weirder that it didn’t necessarily feel wrong. The last time Jack had been there, he had fit into his kitchen the way his grandmother used to. Perhaps the kitchen just needed a person confident in their culinary skills to feel whole.

Zhao Zi pouted when Jack pulled away and made them stand, but was appeased when Jack took his hand, led him to the kitchen table and made him sit and drink some warm milk while he waited for the food to finish. Jack had decided on making a delicious rice and beef dish that would surely knock Zhao Zi back into a deep sleep.

They ate together in silence. Jack reached out to grasp the hand Zhao Zi wasn't using, caressing it softly with his thumb.

This time, Zhao Zi did not pull back.


	6. Chapter 6

The minute he woke up the next morning, reality came crashing down fast. Zhao Zi instinctively rolled over and buried his face into his pillow with a groan. His mind raced through the memories of last night. 

Like an outer-body experience he watched how he unabashedly threw himself into Jack’s arms and clung on.

How embarrassing.

_Jack hadn't pulled away._

The errant thought paused his spiraling emotions.

Zhao Zi breathed in deeply.

He was trying to parse together a semblance of a coherent thought at what had happened last night. From the bar to Jack showing up at his home, he is only able to _feel._ He's caught in the nervousness and simultaneous excitement at Jack approaching him at the bar, the surprise at the offer to dance, the elation at being able just move and release pent up energy, the security he had felt in Jack's arms. Then the loss and hurt at Jack's departure.

He had never expected that Jack would perceive the overflow of emotions that Zhao Zi had been experiencing. Never thought he would realize how overwhelming it was for Zhao Zi, how close to the brink he was.

But he had. And had come at three in the morning to offer support.

A light tingle fluttered across his skin at the thought of Jack’s hand in his own. It was the last clear memory he had of last night before the food coma had set in. 

So what now?

Jack had made it clear that he was scarily insightful when it came to Zhao Zi. So much so, that at this point Zhao Zi was worried Jack knew more than he did about himself.

But what was Jack offering? It seemed to be something much more than friendship, but it scared Zhao Zi to think about it. To hope that someone cared for him deeply, perhaps even _wanted_ him. 

_But Jack had held his hand._

Zhao Zi sighed. He gathered up the willpower and pushed himself off the bed. Think about it now would not bring him any clarity. He could feel his thoughts going in circles, contradicting each other at every turn. Instead, Zhao Zi stood and prepared himself for the day, being careful to only think about the tasks he had to complete in the present. Brush his teeth. Shower. Make his bed. Heat up left overs for breakfast.

An hour later he found himself chewing through a mouthful of leftovers as he checked his emails and messages. Zhao Zi could allow himself a lazy morning; he was only scheduled for the dinner rush today.

His phone pinged. A message from an unknown number. Frowning, he opened it.

 **[Unknown 10:34]:** How are you this morning, shorty?

Zhao Zi nearly dropped his phone. There was only one person who would call him that. He read the rest of the messages.

 **[Unknown 10:34]:** I hope you don’t mind, I got your number from Yi Qi. 

**[Unknown 10:34]:** You should probably be concerned at how fast she gave your number to me. I didn’t even have to charm it out of her.

Zhao Zi cracked a smile and rolled his eyes. His plan to ignore all things regarding Jack until he no longer could was dashed by Jack himself.

Typical.

He saved the number and began to type a reply.

 **[Me 10:36]:** I guess she decided you weren't a danger.

He hit reply and had barely switched to another app before he had received another message.

 **[Jack 10:36]:** I’m not so sure about that.

Zhao Zi worried his lip as he responded.

 **[Me 10:37]:** I think you are just a fluffy teddy bear! ᵔᴥᵔ

A pause.

 **[Jack 10:38]:** You certainly seem to think so last night.

Zhao Zi’s cheeks had to be permanently stained at this point, right? How could Jack allude to last night so casually? He sat there for two whole minutes not knowing how to respond. Jack saved him the trouble.

 **[Jack 10:40]:** Will you be at work tonight?

 **[Me 10:41]:** Yes

 **[Jack 10:41]:** I’ll see you there.

Zhao Zi sighed in relief. He put the phone down and brought his dishes over to the sink.

\--

When Zhao Zi first saw Jack again that afternoon as he walked in for his shift, he instinctively ducked behind a decorative plant. Crouching behind it, he cursed himself for being so instinctively immature.

Zhao Zi watched the redhead pass by in his chef's outfit, seemingly unaware of him cowering behind a plant. He tentatively emerged a minute later, startling Jun Wei on his way to set the tables for dinner service.

“Sorry!” Zhao Zi said hastily, as Jun Wei managed to catch the bin of silverware that had slipped from his grasp before it fell to the ground.

Straightening himself, Jun Wei stared at Zhao Zi in bewilderment.

“What were you doing behind a plant?”

Zhao Zi racked his brains for an explanation. “I-I was just seeing if it needed to be watered!”

“...but it’s fake.”

Zhao Zi let out what he hoped was a convincing chuckle, “So I just found out!”

Jun Wei didn’t seem to be buying it, but he cleared his throat anyway and got a sheepish look in his eye.

“I...uh...Zhao Zi. About yesterday,” he started, seemingly gathering his thoughts. "You seemed upset by some of my words. I just wanted to...you know, apologize if something I said...uh...offended you. I am sure there's a reason...well, rather, I know why someone would want to spend time with you. Chef Jack shouldn't be any different.”

He cleared his throat again and wouldn’t look Zhao Zi in the eye. If his hands had been free, he would have surely been scratching the back of his neck like Zhao Zi had seen him do dozens of times when he was unsure.

Zhao Zi knew Jun Wei did not mean to hurt him yesterday, though his words had stung. The man simply had not been privy to the internal turmoil Zhao Zi had been facing. All the feelings he ordinarily tried to tamp down had been bubbling and threatening to spill over for weeks. Jun Wei’s comment had hurt, not because what it implied was untrue, but because deep down Zhao Zi agreed with its sentiment. He wasn’t sure why someone like Jack would ever waste his time being interested in someone like himself.

“It’s OK,” he said to Jun Wei instead.

He appreciated Jun Wei as a friend, overly protective as he was. 

He turned and advanced towards the kitchen doors. Pushing through, Zhao Zi was greeted by the sight of a lively kitchen prepping for service. The scents of broths and freshly cut foods swirled around his nostrils. Pots and pans clattered and soups simmered. Zhao Zi smiled at the familiarity of it all. It was as if his senses had been dulled for some time and were now fully functional again.

Zhao Zi placed his things in the storage area and grabbed his waiter's pad and pen. As he prepared himself for the night of service, someone sidled up next to him. Zhao Zi inhaled sharply, the scent immediately clueing him into who had appeared. He had become intimately familiar with that scent last night.

Zhao Zi took a steadying breath and looked up to meet Jack’s eyes. Jack was smirking, but in meeting Zhao Zi’s gaze it softened into a warm grin.

“Hello, shorty.”

There went the blush again.

“H-Hi,” Zhao Zi stammered back. He pointedly looked at the floor, unsure of what to say. Should he thank Jack for allowing himself to be used as a comfort pillow last night? How could he express that he wanted a repeat of last night as often as he could get it without dying a thousand deaths from embarrassment?

Jack dipped down a little to catch Zhao Zi’s eye.

“I've wanted to see you since I left,” Jack continued. “Are you alright? I know last night was a lot for you.”

“Y-yes,” he managed to stutter out.

_How did you know, Jack? How did you know what I needed?_

Instead he said, “Thank you. For...uh...last night.”

Smooth.

Jack hummed and moved closer, causing Zhao Zi to squeak in surprise. 

“How would you feel about joining me at a food market tonight?”

Zhao Zi’s thoughts momentarily stopped as he processed the request. The question had been innocent enough. Gathering himself, he relaxed a bit. Food talk. Food he could do.

“A world-renowned chef like you at a local night market?”

“World-renowned might be an exaggeration,” Jack said with a laugh. “I’d like to point out that no matter how ‘world-renowned’ I might be now, my roots are still deeply ingrained in home cooking and traditional Taiwanese food. It would be silly of me--and I rather think of any chef--not to enjoy a good local night market.”

“You’re probably right, but I’ll have you know that I love night markets and I haven’t been to one in a while. Be prepared to eat until you drop!”

Jack's eyes crinkled with joy.

“I look forward to it.”

\---

A couple of hours later, Zhao Zi was in heaven. He was wandering and munching on an oyster omelette he picked up at one of the stands. The food market was bustling tonight: students and nine-to-fivers alike enjoying good food and drinks.

He was having a hard time navigating the crowd and balancing his food. Small as he was, people often bumped into him. After a few close calls, Jack took the plate out of his hand; Zhao Zi had pouted at that. In answer, Jack grabbed his arm and pulled him towards a spot nearby where a makeshift sitting area had been set up. 

He sat Zhao Zi down first, placing his plate in front of him, before taking a seat at the opposite end of the table.

Jack had been very attentive to him and his needs tonight. After closing the restaurant they had ridden together on Jack’s motorcycle to the night market. As they walked, Jack had swung an arm around his shoulders, guiding him to all the different stalls. Zhao Zi had liked that as much as he had enjoyed Jack’s running commentary on the food. In order to be heard above the din of the crowd, Jack spoke closely into his ear, his lips occasionally brushing the shell. The shivers that ran through Zhao Zi in response had caused Jack to ask if he was cold.

Zhao Zi had been too embarrassed to answer, so Jack had given him his jacket.

Zhao Zi could tell he had surprised the red-head tonight. He himself knew a lot about the history of some of the local vendors, having talked to them and written about them on his food blog before. Some of them even greeted him like old friends. He was sure none of the vendors had any idea he had featured them, but he knew from the comments on his blogs that many of his readers had gone to try their food stands after his recommendations. He was glad his reviews would bring some positive traffic their way.

Jack watched him eat his omelette silently.

That was another thing about Jack. He didn't mind silence. He would talk when he needed to, joke around if he wanted, but was just as content to sit there as Zhao Zi stuffed his face. Zhao Zi appreciated that, but tonight he would rather not have the silence.

"Are you going to just stare at me while I eat my food?"

Jack smiled and leaned towards him taking the hint.

“So, tell me. How is it that you know so much about food in general?”

Zhao Zi munched happily on his omelette as he answered. 

“I’ve never learned about it professionally. I just like food! My _nai nai_ always had strong opinions about what was good and what wasn’t. A lot of my opinions stem from hers, though we do differ in that she was a traditionalist and hated eating western food. I fed her blue cheese once and she spoke to my ancestors for a solid half hour wondering what she did wrong, why I was punishing her and begging them to forgive me!” he said with a giggle.

"To be fair, blue cheese is pretty controversial on its own without you trying to feed it to an Asian grandmother with a staunch traditionalist background."

Zhao Zi laughed and inclined his head towards Jack.

“You're probably right." He took another bite of his omelette. "My turn to ask a question now! Why is it that you cook so well, practically live your life in the kitchen, but don’t eat a thing unless you’re reminded to?” 

He looked pointedly at the forgotten plate of _guabao_ in front of Jack. Jack smirked and picked up the bun, some cilantro and peanut crumbs falling out onto the disposable plate. He took a huge bite of it, his cheeks puffing to accommodate the food. As he set it down he raised an eyebrow towards him.

Zhao Zi rolled his eyes, grinning softly at his silliness. "You can't eat like that! You won't appreciate the flavors!"

Jack swallowed.

“To answer your question, I do go hungry. Some would say I am insatiable. Just not for food,” Jack drawled, eyes taking on a mischievous gleam.

Zhao Zi nearly choked on a piece of egg. 

“Jack!” he cried.

Jack huffed out a laugh before nodded over towards a dessert stand. “How about grabbing dessert for the road?”

Zhao Zi shoved the rest of the omelette in his mouth and jumped up, already three steps ahead of Jack by the time the man leisurely stood up to follow.


	7. Chapter 7

Zhao Zi liked to think that Shao Fei was invincible.

Given his friend’s career, he much preferred to believe that he was invincible, because the alternative was constantly being worried sick. He knew Shao Fei. The man was never in the background of dangerous investigations. His propensity for personally taking on dangerous cases and going after criminals had been made quite clear from the tales Shao Fei told Zhao Zi about his work. Zhao Zi knew that his friend had a protective streak a mile wide, willing to give the same amount of protection to family, friends, and strangers alike.

So Zhao Zi liked to think his friend was invincible—and Shao Fei hadn’t proven that theory wrong in all the years he had been in the police force—which is why it came as a surprise when he received a phone call from the hospital one Saturday afternoon.

He had been at home, enjoying this rare Saturday in which he was not scheduled to work at the restaurant. The phone call had pierced through the silence of his home. He had scrambled off his bed, where he had been sprawled reading a book, to grab the phone he had left at his window seat. 

A few minutes later, he was dashing off to the hospital in a panic.

At the beginning of his career as an officer, Shao Fei had told him he would put him down as his emergency contact in case anything happened to him. Though he agreed, Zhao Zi had hoped that there would never come a time in which his phone would ring in that capacity.

But here it was.

When he arrived, a professional albeit curt nurse did her best to calm him. She explained that Shao Fei had been shot in his abdomen, and that he was currently in surgery. There was no further news. He would have to wait until after the surgery was over to find out more. She instructed Zhao Zi to sit down in the waiting room, where the rest of Shao Fei’s team sat. 

Zhao Zi greeted the team members. He had met them all before, having gone out with Shao Fei and his team for drinks on more than one occasion before he had left to Cambodia. They were a good bunch and it was clear that Shao Fei meant a lot to them. They all looked distraught.

"What happened?" he asked them. What could Shao Fei have possibly gotten himself into that had ended up in this position?

After all, for the past few weeks Shao Fei had actually become a permanent fixture at the restaurant, much to the consternation of Hong Ye. Initially worried about his friend's interference in his work life, Zhao Zi had asked him about it. Shao Fei claimed that he was protecting Tang Yi, which baffled Zhao Zi and had done little to quell his worries. Why would Shao Fei protect someone he hated with a passion? And hadn't Shao Fei himself claimed that Tang Yi was mixed up with the wrong sort?

His protective streak couldn't possibly include enemies as well, could it?

The team did not reveal much, leaving Zhao Zi with no more information than with which he started. He decided to take a seat in a far corner of the room.

The waiting room was depressing: it was beige and reeked of a mixture of antiseptics, sickness, and cleaning products. A TV was mounted on the wall, tuned into a kids show that was avidly being watched by a toddler a few seats down.

Zhao Zi brought his feet up and curled into the chair. His heart was in his throat. Thinking on Shao Fei's actions these last few weeks was a blur to Zhao Zi. So caught up was he in his budding...whatever it was with Jack, that Shao Fei's movements had somewhat faded into the background. Shao Fei had continued to follow Tang Yi like a shadow and Jack had distracted Zhao Zi with his presence...and food of course.

Lost in thought, Zhao Zi almost missed it when Tang Yi himself marched in and demanded to speak to whoever was in charge that could tell him about Hong Ye and Shao Fei. Zhao Zi picked up his jaw from the floor as he surveyed the scene. Tang Yi, normally stoic, controlled, and immaculate in his image, stood angry and demanding.

Why was he so worried about Shao Fei? What did he know?

And was Hong Ye here too?

Zhao Zi walked over to the front desk where a small scene was erupting. The nurses were refusing to say anything because Tang Yi was not the emergency contact for Shao Fei. Shao Fei’s team members were yelling at Tang Yi, claiming this was all his fault. Tang Yi looked about one second from marching down to the surgical theater and having a look for himself, before a doctor came out to greet him accompanied by Hong Ye. Hong Ye ran into Tang Yi's arms, tears in her eyes, apologizing over and over for having worried him.

“Tang Yi, calm down,” the doctor said as he approached them. 

"Of course he has connections here," scoffed one of Shao Fei's team.

The doctor did seem to already have a rapport with Tang Yi. He put a hand on Tang Yi's shoulder and steered the pair away from the harried nurses and police. Zhao Zi followed.

“Your Hong Ye here is fine. She was just a bit scratched up from diving onto the floor. Your Meng Shao Fei is in surgery right now. You don't need to harass the nurses, they don’t know anything. So either sit down and wait or go home until we hear something.”

Zhao Zi hadn’t heard anyone quite speak to his boss that way. Disgruntled, Tang Yi sat down in the waiting; Hong Ye took the seat beside him, keeping a tight clutch on his arm. Zhao Zi went unnoticed and so he took the time to observe his boss’ actions, noting the worried frown that had settled on his features.

Tang Yi hadn’t ever given any indication that he cared for Shao Fei. Mostly, he seemed to consider Shao Fei a mild annoyance.

Turning to the cops, Zhao Zi thanked them for being there, but given that it might be a while before anything was heard about Shao Fei, it was best if they went home. They seemed weary of leaving now that Tang Yi was present, but Zhao Zi assured them that there would be no issues. Snidely the captain informed Hong Ye that they would be in touch to get her account of the events, before marching off with the team.

Hong Ye didn't react; instead she stared blankly at the floor.

He looked at Tang Yi again, decided against questioning his boss, and instead retook his spot. 

Somehow in the last few weeks the dynamic between Shao Fei and Tang Yi had changed. Zhao Zi thought about the bar night, where Shao Fei had stormed off in a huff and both of them had disappeared together. Had things changed since then? And what exactly was this change? Shao Fei was someone who had quite a black and white view of the world. There was good and evil, unlawfulness and justice. Where in the past few weeks had his version of evil incarnate begun to care for him?

Zhao Zi felt lost and on top of that was beginning to realize that perhaps he had been growing distant from Shao Fei lately. He felt like he knew nothing about what was going in the man's head, hadn't even bothered to nag him further about his body-guarding of Tang Yi, his mind was always so caught up in his own world, working, writing his blog, and trying to manage the burgeoning feelings he had for Jack.

Shao Fei had been at the periphery, charging head first into danger and Zhao Zi hadn't even noticed.

But as Jack steadily swathed his way into Zhao Zi’s life, somewhere, off path and unseen until now, something had changed between Shao Fei and Tang Yi. 

Biting his lip, Zhao looked away from his boss, allowing him some sort of privacy.

He would ask Shao Fei about it later.

After all, he was invincible.


	8. Chapter 8

Zhao Zi alternated between worrying, watching the muted television in the waiting room, glancing at the doors that led to the emergency units, and playing with his phone. The battery on his phone soon died out, so he made himself as comfortable as he could in his chair. At some point he must’ve fallen asleep because he woke up disorientated a few hours later to a nurse gently shaking him awake.

“Sir, your friend just came out of surgery and is doing well. He is in stable condition and we are quite confident he will make a full recovery.”

Zhao Zi’s heart jumped in elation, and he couldn’t help the tears that sprung to his eyes. Shao Fei had pulled through!

“Can I see him?”

“It will be a couple of hours before we allow anyone to enter his room to ensure that he keeps stable in his condition after such extensive surgery. We suggest you go home, rest, and then come back tomorrow. Your friend is in good hands and we will call if any major changes occur.”

Zhao Zi took note of the time. It was almost midnight and he had spent the last few hours scrunched up into a ball on a waiting room chair. His joints were aching something fierce. He stretched and resolved to follow the nurse's advice.

Grabbing a cab outside the hospital, he arrived home half an hour later. Trudging up the stairs, he finally collapsed on his bed in exhaustion, barely managing to plug his phone in to charge. When his phone booted up, he noticed that he had a couple of missed texts, mostly from his co-workers celebrating Hong Ye's unannounced but welcome absence.

The team did breath a little easier when she wasn't there, though he was sure that they would not be in such high spirits if they had known she had been in danger.

He opened a message from Yi Qi and was shocked to find a sneakily captured photo of Jack. The man wore his chef's outfit, his red hair contrasting brightly against the dark material of his uniform. He appeared to be standing at the kitchen pass, hands on his hips, waiting for orders. His expression resembled a disgruntled puppy.

She had written: 'He always looks like this when you're not on shift! (*^_^*)'

Zhao Zi buried his face into his pillow, exhausted enough to fall asleep as soon as he closed his eyes.

\--

The next morning, Zhao Zi woke up at the manageable hour of 9AM and used the spare keys Shao Fei had given him to stop by his apartment and grab his always-packed emergency bag. At least Shao Fei had been prepared. 

He arrived at the hospital not an hour later and was directed towards his friend's room.

A second after entering he paused.

Tang Yi was already there watching Shao Fei from the foot of the bed.

His boss looked up at his entry, eyes reluctantly tearing away from Shao Fei. Though his face betrayed nothing at the interruption, Zhao Zi had caught a glimpse of the tenderness of his boss' expression before he had registered his entry.

And he had never seen Tang Yi look quite like that.

Tang Yi gave Shao Fei one last glance before brushing past Zhao Zi and leaving without a word.

Nonplussed, Zhao Zi entered, thoughts once again whirling around the relationship between Shao Fei and Tang Yi until he saw Shao Fei’s pallid form for the first time.

Shao Fei's face was ashen, dark circles surrounded his eyes and all color had left his lips. His inky hair lay flat on his forehead in stark contrast to his skin. His breathing seemed stable enough, the steady rise and fall of his chest was reassuring.

He was alive. That’s what mattered.

Zhao Zi busied himself with settling into the guest couch. He had already texted Hong Ye about his absence for the next few days as he watched over Shao Fei and helped with his recovery. He had been unsure whether he should inquire after Hong Ye's health, but eventually decided against it. She had seemed pretty shocked at the time; he wouldn't have been surprised if she hadn't registered that he had been present at the hospital at all. And Zhao Zi didn't want to bring up bad thoughts for her. So instead he mentioned needing to care for his friend and left it at that. Hong Ye had been surprisingly lenient; perhaps Tang Yi had advocated for him.

Though he was glad that he could be in the same space as Shao Fei and available to him when he eventually woke up, Zhao Zi was bored. At noon the food cart had come by and dropped off a tray of food despite Shao Fei being unconscious.

Zhao Zi eyed the plate. He hadn't eaten in so long and he couldn't possibly let that food go to waste...

One bite in and he had regretted his decision.

When evening came and the dinner tray was dropped off, Shao Fei still hadn't gained consciousness. Like a goldfish, Zhao Zi also attempted to eat that as well, but halfway through, with his taste buds at war with his stomach, he decided to go downstairs to the cafeteria and see if better options were available to him.

That night, he entertained the thought of writing a blog about the food he had eaten that day. It was not a tale of culinary finesse, or a review of a wonderful and quirky local shop, but he thought perhaps his readers would enjoy it and see it as humorous. Plus, he wanted to write; it helped keep his mind centered.

**Food Review: Taipei's General Hospital...**

_**Taipei, Taiwan** _

_At times life throws you a curve ball, and instead of finding yourself dining at a fun new local eatery, you find yourself chowing down on hospital grub. Remarkable though it is in patient care—and rated one of the top hospitals in this country—Taipei's General Hospital is quite an adventure when it comes to dining._

_Food is served to patients at very specific times a day whether they are conscious for it or not. A friend of mine, who ran into an unfortunate incident this past week, was not awake during his meal times. Nevertheless, I saved the hospital from waste by taking up the duty of eating the food that had been brought to them for lunch and dinner. My friend seemed satiated enough with his IV._

_Perhaps calling what I had for lunch 'black rice congee' is a bit too generous._ _The watery drivel was flavorless and had sesame seeds thrown in almost as if in decorative afterthought. The food was the culinary equivalent of the beige color of the emergency department waiting room: uninspired and lacking soul. It was clear that no kind_ _nai nai_ _was in the kitchen making food for the sick of this hospital. If there had been, they would've definitely snuck in some more spices past the nutritional censors._

_I am, however, a glutton in nature and so despite my warning sign from lunch, I eagerly awaited dinner. It arrived promptly at 5:00PM. A bowl of beef noodle soup, a small pound cake, and a salad. Now, I have often claimed it is quite difficult to ruin beef noodle soup, and before you, my readers, I acknowledge I have erred. Like the congee, I essentially ate textured hot liquid. The salad, however, did have a delightful mystery dressing (trust me readers I sat for a long time trying to parse through those flavors) that almost made up for it._

_Determined not to deprive my taste buds of taste any further, and perhaps searching for a miracle, I headed down to the hospital cafeteria._ _The giant menu spans above the heads of the employees behind the counter. At this place, it is a mad dash to be noticed, no one pretends to form a line. In between doctors scurrying in to grab a bite during their lunch minute, visitors silently crying into their wilted salads, and administrators using the counter space as an extension of the water cooler, it was a wonder that when I was finally noticed, I was greeted with a warm smile and a kind "What can I get you?"_

_Here was the kind grandmother I had been searching for! Much to my embarrassment I had not even thought about what I wanted! I was so caught up in the bustle of the small space. Once again the employee smiled and said she recommended the lunch special: a fried pork rice bowl, almond bun, and hot ginger milk. Though unsure about the drink choice paired with the meal, I readily agreed._

_I was unprepared for the richness in flavor. The pork was glazed in a sauce containing soy sauce, sugar, and some kind of wine, clearly cooked alongside spices--among the flavors I could pick out Sichuan peppercorn, ginger, anise, cloves and cinnamon--and was juicy at each bite. Over the pork was a sprinkling of green onions, adding a nice contrast both visually and taste-wise to the meat._

_I savored the dish for some time before moving on to the almond bun and hot ginger milk. The combination was a palate soother after the explosion of flavor from the main dish._

_What a surprise to have found such a celebration of flavor at a hospital cafeteria._

_I left satiated, so much so that I felt guilty as I watched the nurses replace my friend's nutritional IV. Then I remembered that he would have surely doused the meal with mountains of chili-sauce, effectively ruining the dish, and I felt better in that, at least for the day, that perfect combination of flavors had been saved from him._

He edited the piece and posted it, happy that he was keeping up with his promise to himself to post more frequently. His food blog had been born out of his passion for food and the loss of his grandmother. It alleviated his soul to be able to talk food with others who were just as passionate and opinionated about it as he was. In their comments he found comfort, humor, and even the spice of disagreement once in a while. He felt understood in a way that not many people, even Shao Fei, were able to perceive in his life.

But now he had Jack and Jack, without asking much, seemed to really understand him.

Zhao Zi navigated to the last review he had posted. It was about a Japanese tea shop that he and Jack had visited two weeks prior. The review told of his misadventures in following the steps of the tea ceremony. What he had lacked in grace, he had made up for in enthusiasm, and the tea master seemed to forgive his many faux pas. Jack on the other hand had been nothing short of beautiful in his movements, causing the tea master to inquire afterwards if he had practice the art before. Zhao Zi had been envious of his skills, but acknowledged that to Jack, being quiet in movement and graceful seemed to come second nature.

Thinking about the outing made a fluttery feeling arise in Zhao Zi's chest. 

Choosing not to prod at that particular feeling in that particular moment, he settled back in the lounge chair, occasionally looking over at Shao Fei, catching the rise and fall of his chest.

\--

The next day, Shao Fei opened his eyes. He was still weak, but despite his injuries appeared to be in good spirits. Unfortunately, it did not take long for them to start bickering.

“Your grandmother told me I would live a long life.”

“Yeah, but you kind of have to work at that, not actively throw yourself in front of bullets!”

“She said it was my destiny. How is it destiny if not already predetermined based on who I am as a person?”

Zhao Zi had fallen silent at that. 

He eyed Shao Fei whose expression betrayed his current displeasure at the predicament of being bed-ridden. Zhao Zi knew that when Shao Fei was not happy with something, he would let it be known and would actively begin remedying the situation. He knew he didn't stand a chance if Shao Fei began to fuss and attempt to get up, so he tried to distract him instead.

"So what's going on between you and Tang Yi?"

Well...that could've been smoother. It worked though, because Shao Fei dropped the IV line he had been contemplating and a blush graced his features.

Huh...

Zhao Zi stalked closer, sitting at the foot of the bed. "He seemed to be really worried about you when you were in surgery. And he was here the morning when your visitations started." He paused. Then, "I thought you hated him."

"I don't hate him-"

"Whatever happened to 'He is a former gangster' and 'his food is probably laced with addictive cocaine which is why people keep on eating there?'"

"I thought you wanted me to see the good in him?"

"I did. I'm just not sure why you have?"

Shao Fei sighed.

"He's...caring..."

"What?"

Shao Fei glared at him. "I've been protecting him over the last few weeks. Well...I really just wanted to gain insight into his operations-"

"I knew it.

"But it made me realized he's...caring."

"So you took a bullet for his sister because he's...'caring?'"

"When did you become the detective?"

The 12:00PM food delivery briefly interrupted their conversation. 

"What about the club?"

Shao Fei's eyes flicked skyward.

Zhao Zi was normally not this insistent, but he needed to know because he had a feeling that the way Shao Fei felt about Tang Yi was similar to the way he felt about Jack and Shao Fei had always done the right thing and maybe if he could just point Zhao Zi in the right direction...

Shao Fei, glanced over his shoulder and a small smile graced his lips. Zhao Zi turned his head and spotted Tang Yi entering the room accompanied by Jack.

"Tang Yi!" Shao Fei exclaimed, his eyes lighting up at the sight of the man.

In the next moment, Tang Yi walked over to Shao Fei, placed a hand on either side of his face, and brought their lips together.

And that’s when everything slotted into place.

\--

Zhao Zi knew that Jack had brought him home somehow. The image of Tang Yi kissing Shao Fei was etched into his memory and he had been thinking about it ever since Jack pulled him from the room. He had vague impressions of Jack murmuring to him and guiding him home safely, but his thoughts were muddled. He was in shock because Shao Fei had noticed Tang Yi was caring and Tang Yi had somehow realized that Shao Fei was not annoying and he had just kissed Shao Fei and Shao Fei had inexplicably kissed back...

“Welcome home!”

Zhao Zi startled. Looking up he realized that he was in fact home. Jack unbuckled his helmet and helped him remove it. They walked together up the path to his house in silence. Zhao Zi couldn't think of what to say as he desperately bat away at his thoughts. Treacherous as his mind was, it had even begun to morph the scene at the hospital, inserting new characters, one with red hair and a green jacket and the other with short black hair who had to tiptoe to reach—

His trembling hand tried not once but twice to insert the key into the keyhole of his door, but it wasn’t working.

He felt Jack reach around him, felt his trembling hand go warm as Jack wrapped his own hand around it to steady it. Jack guided the key into the lock and Zhao Zi heard the telltale sound of the locking mechanism releasing its clasp. Jack stepped back from him.

“Why are you nervous?”

Zhao Zi couldn’t even face him.

A pause, then, “If you want me to leave, I’ll go.”

Zhao Zi let out a breath. 

“No, don’t go.”

He didn't want to be alone.

He managed to finally get the door open and slipped inside. He kicked off his shoes at the entrance. Jack followed suit.

They turned to look at each other, Zhao Zi nervously picking at his sleeve. Jack looked at him with a small smile, seemingly deciding on something.

“Do you want to have dessert?”

Zhao Zi perked up, spotting the bag Jack held in his hand. Had he brought that for him to the hospital?

He immediately agreed.

Jack grinned and nodded over at the couch. 

“Why don’t you turn something on for us to watch. I’ll make us some tea and set up the desserts for you. I've been working on a couple of recipes while you were away.”

Zhao Zi went to the television set, and tried to lose himself in the task of choosing a show to watch. There were a lot of movies and comedy sketch shows on, but Jack was in his kitchen, by now fully capable of navigating it by himself and it made Zhao Zi feel good to hear his tinkering.

Zhao looked at the desserts he was preparing. It was funny how often Jack made dessert given the fact that Jack himself wasn't particularly fond of sweets. Though he had never mentioned anything, Zhao Zi was proud that he had noticed. Jack never really ate any of his dessert creations, choosing to feed them to Zhao Zi and gauge the recipe based on his opinion. Even when Zhao Zi offered to share, he would take one bite and no more or would more often than not decline all together.

Zhao Zi turned his attention back to the television and chose a variety show at random. Jack came, set down their teas and an assortment of desserts on the coffee table before joining him on the couch.

Zhao Zi's mouth watered.

On the platter were three desserts, all delicately decorated in a style that Zhao Zi felt he could recognize as quintessentially Jack. Lots of fresh fruit, and a sprinkling of powdered sugar topped them. Zhao Zi couldn't help but dig in.

Jack settled back into the couch, cup of tea in hand. He had taken off his jacket at the door and riding gloves, leaving him in a simple white t-shirt and black jeans. He looked like he had come home from a long day of work and was settling in to finally decompress.

Zhao Zi liked how he fit in so well in his home, though, in thinking about it, Jack never seemed to be uncomfortable in any setting.

Eyeing the small arrangement of desserts, he grabbed a blueberry topped sponge cake and took his first bite.

An involuntary moan escaped him and Jack smiled into his cup of tea.

Three desserts later, Zhao Zi sat back on the couch and found himself surprised to have his back land partly on Jack’s chest and forearm. He sprung away quickly, turning to apologize.

The words died on his lips when Jack brought a hand up to his face and held him there. 

A look of amusement flitted across Jack’s face; his gaze fixated on Zhao Zi’s lips.

“You have sugar on your lips,” he noted.

Zhao Zi made a move to wipe it away, but Jack shook his hand. 

“I got it, shorty,” he murmured.

Jack’s lips were warm, Zhao Zi thought. He sat paralyzed as the man pressed multiple light kisses against his lips, gently sucking at the sugar. On the final one, Jack drew back a little to look at him. His eyes were half-lidded, gazing at him affectionately. The thumb of the hand that still cupped Zhao Zi’s face lightly grazed the smaller man’s cheek.

“B-but you don’t like sweets,” Zhao Zi blurted out.

Jack chuckled. “I just kissed you and that is all you have to say?”

Zhao could feel the trembling of his own body. He was scared, but at the same time could feel excitement coursing through his body.

Jack had kissed him.

Had pressed his lips to Zhao Zi’s and wanted to.

Zhao Zi licked his lips, tasting the lingering sweetness of the desserts he had eaten. Jack was waiting for a response.

He needed to let Jack know that what had just transpired between them was the most exciting moment of Zhao Zi’s existence. That he wanted more, wanted to taste Jack too, perhaps go further and _feel_ him. He wanted to give into him, bury himself into his arms like he had before and stay there.

But he found that he could not speak. The words would not spill from his mouth. They were too raw to be uttered because that would leave him exposed and wanting and he wasn't sure if Jack was ready for all that Zhao Zi desired.

Zhao Zi instead leaned into the hand that caressed his face, pressing his cheek into Jack's palm. He watched as Jack’s eyes seemed to glow warmly in response. 

Did he understand what Zhao Zi was trying to say?

In the next moment, Jack moved forward again and captured Zhao Zi’s lips. He was more assertive this time, hand taking a firm hold of his chin and pulling him closer. His mouth parted over Zhao Zi's, deepening the kiss. Zhao Zi held on to Jack helplessly, losing his breath in wonder but trying to respond as best he could to the welcomed onslaught. 

He was soaring, propelled by desire and the tongue that Jack had just slipped into his mouth.


	9. Chapter 9

Jack slowly pulled away from Zhao Zi and opened his eyes to look at him. The small man was still caught up in the moment; eyes closed, lips still slightly pursed and red, breathing ragged.

He let his gaze roam over Zhao Zi's face, a feeling of trepidation slowly rising in him. Now that they were no longer kissing, he had to think of what came next and what usually came next was that Zhao Zi would start to become distinctly aware of their touching, grow shy, and retreat.

Jack wouldn’t be able to take it if Zhao Zi pulled back now. He had been on unsteady ground with Zhao Zi for so long, and though normally adaptable, Jack had found himself feeling at a loss.

His initial chasing had come off too strong. Then, when he had tried to pull back, Zhao Zi had been hurt. And for a man who had lived the life he had lived, who had easily moved in spaces where seeing hurt and pain was unavoidable, seeing Zhao Zi regress into himself had been almost unbearable.

He had never felt this innate need to keep someone safe and happy other than himself. However, looking at Zhao Zi, eyes open now, bright and innocently gazing back at him, he knew that he would tear apart anyone who dimmed his light.

Jack pulled at the man, guiding him onto his lap. He felt him wrap his arms tightly around his waist, snuggle into his chest, and sigh contentedly.

Jack had long suspected that Zhao Zi was to some degree touch starved; his reactions to Jack's small touches had always been so intense. He had wondered why the man was afraid to take the affection he so clearly needed, especially when Jack handed it out so willingly. Though Zhao Zi went about his life satisfied with a great job, friends, and good food to eat, Jack knew for a fact that Zhao Zi needed more. He needed companionship, affection, and understanding. Needed to come back to a home that enveloped him in those feelings everyday. Needed it just like air, because without it, he was left gasping.

But he was afraid to take offered affection, perhaps unwilling to burden someone with his needs or perhaps afraid to have them be met and then lost again.

The redhead absentmindedly placed a kiss on top of Zhao Zi's head, deep in thought.

Jack had always been needed. In his previous line of work before becoming the head chef at Trapped, Jack had carried the reputation of being highly skilled and able to achieve anything. His notoriety led to him being in constant demand; whether it was kingpins, gangs, or law enforcement, they always needed something and needed him to get it. A name, a supply, a hit. Jack moved through the world understanding that need is what made the world go ‘round.

So Jack was not uncomfortable with need. Did not feel disorientated by its intensity or its urgency. He understood it as the single most natural experience on this earth. We need to drink water. We need air. And at times, some of us need a caress, a hug, or even kisses.

Eyeing the man plastered across his front, Jack acknowledged that Zhao Zi’s needs were not ones that could be selectively fulfilled—one-offs that were up to his discretion like all his previous missions. These were everlasting needs and the immensity of _that_ thought, for a moment, left him floundering.

But holding him there, Jack felt eager to continue in this pursuit, enraptured by the brightness of Zhao Zi, like a moth to a flame.

\----

This had been his first kiss.

His first.

He breathed in and breathed out, trying to calm his heart that was thumping wildly in his chest. Jack smelled wonderful: clean and fresh, like newly laundered linens. It was a comforting scent, simple yet homey. He buried his face into Jack's chest, hoping to just lose himself in the feeling of being close to him and desperately trying to ignore the small voice at the back of his head telling him he was playing with fire the longer he remained in Jack's arms.

He felt Jack bring up a hand to his head and stroke his hair, easily carding through it. Zhao Zi almost purred at the contact.

“You’re not thinking of running away again are you?” He heard Jack cheekily ask above him.

Zhao Zi shook his head minutely. He supposed that was fair.

He felt Jack exhale.

“We’ll have to talk about this, shorty. You know that right?”

Zhao Zi nodded his head minutely again and he felt Jack place another kiss on top of his head. Zhao Zi allowed himself to be coaxed away from the man's chest. He shifted so that his knees were at either side of Jack’s hips, firmly planted on the couch as he sat upright on his lap. Jack brought his arms around to encircle Zhao Zi’s waist; he was trapped.

“I’ve already told you how I feel, Zhao Zi, but if it bears repeating, then I will. I like you. I like the way you think, how passionately you enjoy food, how you care for those around you. I like how needy you are-"

"-I'm not needy!"

Jack raised an eyebrow and pointedly grazed his fingers lightly against Zhao Zi's collar bone. Zhao Zi whimpered.

Damn his treacherous body.

"Th-That doesn't mean anything!"

"Admit it, shorty. You want, no _need_ to be touched. Want to be hugged, caressed, kissed, maybe even bitten-"

"Jack!," Zhao Zi cried slapping a hand over Jack's mouth to stop the list from growing cruder. Jack's eyes glinted in mirth and Zhao Zi could feel the man's lips pulling into a grin from behind his hand.

Zhao Zi couldn't deny how good it felt when Jack touched him, even simple gestures like a ruffle of his hair, or the brush of a hand. He always found himself wanting more of it, but was afraid of this desire and couldn't burden Jack with it. But from what Jack had said...he liked Zhao Zi...liked that he needed...

Jack placed a soft kiss on Zhao Zi's fingers, causing the smaller man to gasp and slowly lower his hand. The redhead took the opportunity to continue.

"I want to make sure you are safe and always eating. I have never felt this for someone before, have never cared to. But now that I do, I would rather not have to let it go."

He tried to catch Zhao Zi’s eyes, but Zhao Zi’s eyes remained averted, trained somewhere behind him.

“I don't want to be just friends with you, shorty. I can't. But if you don’t want me, I understand. However, you will have to prepare yourself because I wouldn’t be able to stick around.”

Zhao Zi’s heart seized and his eyes jumped to Jack’s.

“What does that mean?”

“It means that I would not be staying here in Taiwan.”

“Is that a threat?”

“No, I'm telling you how things are.”

Zhao Zi frowned, eyes looking troubled.

“What about the restaurant?”

“The restaurant is used to change. It thrives on it. You know that.”

They sat in silence.

Zhao Zi couldn’t ignore the churning of his stomach. Jack would leave. If Zhao Zi didn’t accept him, Jack would leave.

Zhao Zi felt his throat obstruct with hundreds of words clamoring to come out.

_Don’t go. Please._

_You know I don’t want you to go. You have to know._

_I’ve never felt this way before. I want to cook with you, eat with you, laugh with you, everything...I..._

_I need you._

He couldn’t say them out loud.

\--

Jack could adapt. If he slipped away now, he could perhaps move on with his life as he had always done when a mission was complete. He knew through his sources that his services were still being sought after. He had temporarily given up on that world, focusing his attention on the restaurant, intrigued by Tang Yi’s ascent outside of the gang world and those that followed him. It was interesting to get a look at it first hand, watch and participate in both the triumphs and the slip-ups.

Then Zhao Zi had caught his attention and he found himself caught up in the world of a small, innocent man with an amazing taste for food. Zhao Zi had once asked him what his story was and it appeared that inadvertently Jack had made Zhao Zi a part of it.

Sitting here in silence, in the wake of asking Zhao Zi what he wanted, if he even wanted him, he felt, for perhaps the first time in his life, fear. Had he miscalculated? Had he been blinded by his desires enough to not realize that though Zhao Zi's sensory needs were being met, the feelings Jack had for him were simply not reciprocated?

The silence hung around them and Jack’s breath hitched as a twinge pulled at his chest.

Huh. So that is what it felt like to hurt.

He moved to extricate himself from Zhao Zi.

“I’ll go,” he found himself saying quietly.

Zhao Zi prevented him from moving and instead clung on. He wrapped his arms around Jack, buried his face into the warmth of his neck.

“Please...don’t.”

It was said softly, so softly Jack had almost missed it. But it had been said and the constricted feeling in Jack’s chest loosened marginally.

"I-I like you too."

He sat back, and once again made Zhao Zi sit upright and look him in the eye. This would be something they had to work on.

Jack’s eyes settled into an affectionate gaze, before he stretched up to nuzzle at Zhao Zi’s nose, whispering, “Take what you need, shorty.”

He bit back his gasp of surprise when Zhao Zi heeded his words and placed his lips on the redhead’s. Jack allowed him to control this kiss, just accepting whatever Zhao Zi gave him. Zhao Zi’s kisses were tentative, light pecks—an innocent exploration. Jack ran a hand up and down the line of Zhao Zi’s spine, reassuring him.

Zhao Zi released his lips, “Was that OK?”

Jack nodded.

“That was more than OK.”

Zhao Zi grinned and that’s what Jack liked to see.


	10. Chapter 10

“Zhao Zi, if you stare any harder, Jack will purposefully prolong your torture and by extension ours.”

Zhao Zi pouted but ripped his eyes away from the man knowing Yi Qi had a point. His body was thrumming in excitement. After a year and a half of successfully running Trapped under a Taiwanese menu, Jack and Tang Yi had finally decided that a change was in order. Everything was kept hush hush as it usually was, so much so that even Zhao Zi, the partner of the head chef, was not in the know.

Partner.

Zhao Zi’s mind still swam at the thought that he was someone’s partner. That he was Jack’s. For all the good it did him, he thought bitterly staring down at the closed menu in front of him. At one point he had resorted to surreptitiously sniffing Jack’s clothes when he came home from work to see if he could catch a whiff of some herbs, spices, _anything_ that would give away what cuisine the restaurant would be adopting next.

The media was embroiled in a bitter battle of clashing predictions supported by unsupported rumors. Some thought the restaurant’s cuisine would continue within the Asian continent, but perhaps softer and more delicate in flavors like the food of Japan. Others hoped they would bring something rare to Taiwan, perhaps inspired by Jack’s time abroad and exposure to many cultures. Even on his blog, Zhao Zi had an entire thread dedicated to the speculation. He loved seeing what his readers thought and hypothesizing with them. In any case, Zhao Zi knew whatever Jack did would be amazing.

He just needed to hurry up about it.

Hong Ye had worked them like mules setting up the restaurant for the change of atmosphere and cuisine. As always they got their first hint as to where the restaurant’s cuisine journey might take them through the décor. Gone were the darker swathes of red, greens, and blues, now replaced by brighter lighting and a fresher, yet sophisticated color story of white and turquoise. Around the restaurant were pops of color, decorations in bold, bright oranges and yellows. Particularly prominent was the amount of live greenery that abounded. It all made Zhao Zi feel like he belonged in the tropics.

Tang Yi, Jack, and a handsome, clearly foreign man unknown to them all crossed to the front of the room. The dining hall quieted.

“Thank you all for your hard work,” Tang Yi began. “Today we are undergoing another transition, though thankfully this one did not come with another search for a chef. Those do get tiring.”

The room tittered.

“Since Chef Jack has yet to throw a knife at one of you, we have decided to keep him. That being said, as is tradition in our restaurant, the cuisine must change and you all will be the first to try it. Please do enjoy.”

He bowed to them respectfully and the employees dipped their heads in return.

Jack stepped forward with his easy grin. “I wouldn’t count out knife throwing just yet,” he murmured with a pointed glance at Jun Wei who sank into his chair next to Zhao Zi. It was well known by the staff that Jun Wei and Jack had a...rivalry of sorts. They respected each other, but would still annoy the other to no end. Zhao Zi knew Jun Wei was still suspicious of Jack's intentions though he tried to pretend otherwise. Jack knew this as well and would needle him because of it. Zhao Zi had told off Jack many times about it, but Jack shrugged it off and said it was harmless.

Jack cleared his throat. “I have prepared a menu of Latin American inspiration—”

Gasps of excitement were heard around the room. Zhao Zi himself felt his stomach jump in anticipation.

“—rooted in the time I spent hopping around many of the countries in the Carribean. This man here,” he said gesturing to the stranger who stepped forward and bowed respectfully to them, “taught me everything I know. He was born and raised in the Dominican Republic and has spent his life studying the food of his own country and those surrounding it. I am honored to have studied under him for a short while and he graciously agreed to come to Taiwan to freshen up my memory when I told him my plan to introduce a Latin American menu here.”

The foreigner grinned, “It was a pleasure! Nothing like late night cooking and planning with a prodigy.”

“Without further ado, please enjoy Trapped's new menu.”

The men retreated back into the kitchen and they were finally allowed to open up the menu.

“Has this man been everywhere?” Jun Wei disgruntledly asked as he roughly opened the menu booklet.

"Unfortunately," Meng Shao Fei muttered from his end of the table. He had of course been invited to partake in the festivities; being Tang Yi's partner had its perks. "Think about how hard his background was to tail down on the investigative end when he has been in nearly every part of the world."

"Did you manage it?" Jun Wei asked eagerly.

The man was still waiting for details that would render Jack's mysterious past clear, but Shao Fei immediately dampened his hopes.

"If I had, he probably wouldn't be working here."

"Yeah, because he would probably be in prison-"

Yi Qi kicked Jun Wei underneath the table and Jun Wei glanced over at Zhao Zi guiltily. Zhao Zi didn’t blame him; based on Jack’s scantily detailed stories and the rumors that surrounded him, it seemed that he had spent the better part of his life traveling the world and getting into some nefarious business. But just like Shao Fei had decided with Tang Yi, the world wasn't black and white, it was nuanced and people's past choices didn't necessarily dictate who they were now. He wouldn't allow himself to think about Jack's past and get boggled down by thoughts of who he had been. He knew the Jack of now and liked the person he was now, with him.

Looking at the menu, Zhao Zi felt himself grin. There were so many dishes he had not heard of, though the small descriptions had his mouth watering and his stomach dying to try them all. This menu was a real surprise; he was sure it would be a hit. There weren't very many Latin American food spots in Taiwan. It would be an introduction to a new cuisine for many and would fuel interest.

Zhao Zi noted that plantains seemed to be a staple of many dishes, as well as rice and meat. He ordered a couple of dishes, some of which had names he did not know how to pronounce. He had never heard of a _mofongo_ and was genuinely wondering if the drink he chose, a _morir soñando_ , would give him a stomachache. Orange juice and milk? Wasn’t that a food sin?

When the dishes arrived for their table, Zhao Zi immediately noticed how rich and fragrant everything was. He reached for his drink, studiously ignoring Shao Fei who was dumping a ton of hot sauce onto his dish without even trying it. The drink was light orange in color and slightly frothy. It was garnished with a thinly sliced orange wedge and edible purple flower that provided a beautiful color contrast. He took a sip of it and let out a noise of surprise.

Yi Qi grinned over at him. “Was it worth the wait?”

“This is such an odd combination, so wrong, but so right!”

He placed his drink down and turned to his pork _mofongo_. The mashed plantains were yellow and plated in a domed style with pieces of pork mixed within. There was a dark colored sauce paired with it and fresh salad with bright greens and tomatoes. Biting into it, Zhao Zi savored the nice blend of garlic, oil, and salt of the plantain base with the deeper and richer taste of the well-seasoned pork mixed in it. He moaned in pleasure and immediately went to grab another bite.

“Slow down there, shorty,” said a voice from behind him and Zhao Zi jumped in surprise as Jack took the empty seat next to him.

Zhao Zi swallowed hard. “Jack! What are you doing out here?”

“Thought I would slip away and see how my favorite food critic is enjoying the food.”

Zhao Zi could hear Jun Wei scoff in the background, but he ignored him. At this point, he was used to Jack's antics in front of the others.

“You could’ve given me a hint, you know!”

Jack grinned and quirked his head to the side, saying, "It was more fun this way.”

He nodded over at the plate, eyes twinkling with affection, “Thoughts?”

“I will put them on the comments card. See if you can find mine this time!”

“Ah, a challenge.”

“Some of us are trying to eat here,” Jun Wei stated pointedly.

“I don’t know, I think their flirting is cute,” Yi Qi said with a smile.

Jack rolled his eyes, stood up, and ruffled Zhao Zi’s hair. “Enjoy, shorty. I will see you later.”

Zhao Zi nodded, happily grinning up at him around a mouthful of plantains.

\--

Waking up with a start, Zhao Zi's heart immediately settled down as he caught a whiff of Jack's freshly showered scent settling next to him in bed. It was past midnight, the kitchen staff having stayed behind to prepare the kitchen for business tomorrow. Zhao Zi had gone home first, but had fallen asleep waiting for Jack.

He reached blindly for the man, dragged himself closer, and settled his face into the crook of the redhead's neck.

It had taken him some time to feel comfortable enough to not second guess his affection seeking. Jack had been patient with him, recognizing when Zhao Zi struggled to make his desires known. He had been instrumental in drawing out the side of Zhao Zi that sought to hide away, afraid of being hurt and abandoned. Jack wanted him to desire, to be unafraid to ask, to take.

Jack wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close, dropping a kiss on his forehead. 

"Did you like the food tonight?"

Zhao Zi smiled. He liked that Jack still asked for his opinion on the food despite his clear confidence in his own cooking. It made him feel like he mattered.

"Yes, I loved it. Foodgasm of the century."

"Are you going to write that in your blog post?"

Zhao Zi lightly thwacked the man's bare chest.

Jack had found out about his blog about a month into their relationship, with Zhao Zi having inadvertently left the editing page open on his computer while going off to seek a glass of water in the kitchen. And Jack did always have sharp eyes...

In the end, Zhao Zi had fessed up to the blog and the redhead had spent the rest of the afternoon reading the reviews Zhao Zi had written of Trapped under Jack's regime out loud, until Zhao Zi had had enough and decided to occupy his mouth in another, decidedly more favorable manner. 

"Or will you say something more eloquent, such as: 'The plantain dishes that I had were beautifully seasoned; so simple in ingredients yet extraordinary in flavor. To introduce such a foreign palette and make it feel so familiar is a testament to your skill. How do you manage to make it all feel like home?'"

Zhao Zi's breath drew short. Then, "How did you know which one was mine!?"

Jack laughed as Zhao Zi scrambled up on his elbows to look at him. He held the comment card up with two fingers and gave Zhao Zi a mischievous smile. The moonlight was streaming in from the large window whose curtains he had forgotten to draw. It cast a soft glow across the man's face, allowing Zhao Zi to see the glint of humor in his eyes.

"It wasn't particularly difficult. You could've at least tried harder to hide your undying love for me."

Zhao Zi's cheeks turned bright red and he reburied his face into Jack's neck.

That was the next hurtle he had to overcome. Jack had always been quite candid with his feelings and had had no problem telling him he loved him. Zhao Zi still wasn't over the embarrassment of his reaction to the first time Jack had said those words to him.

It had been a quiet evening, a rare day they both had off, and it found them cooking together in the kitchen. Zhao Zi had been craving Jack's beef noodle soup, so Jack had set him to the task of dicing green onions while he finished preparing the beef. Finishing in his task, Jack had washed his hands and then wrapped his arms around Zhao Zi's waist, kissing the back of his neck lightly.

Zhao Zi loved being enveloped in Jack's warmth, feeling the man's body pressed against his own. He loved the stillness that overcame the world when he was in Jack's arms; everything fell away, became so quiet, so immaterial compared to the feeling of Jack.

He had whimpered at the touch, craving more, always more.

His breath had hitched when he felt Jack press a kiss onto his ear, then lightly nibble just a little.

Then, "I love you."

And Zhao Zi had driven the knife through his finger in shock.

In the emergency room, Jack had later admitted that it had not been one of his brightest ideas. Zhao Zi had recovered enough from the shock to tease him endlessly about his failure to follow kitchen safety guidelines. 

But now in their bed, that day long past, and with Jack easily teasing him about the love they shared, Zhao Zi couldn't help but feel the enormity of all they had experienced and would experience together. He looked up at Jack and something must have changed in his expression, because Jack's smile faltered, his expression giving away to a more thoughtful look.

"What do you need, shorty?"

Zhao Zi couldn't help but huff out a small, incredulous laugh, because he was still in awe that he had found this, that Jack had found him, and so he leaned forward to kiss the man to take exactly what he needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading!


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